thinking

Where are Your Decisions Leading You

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Think about the all the small decisions you make on a daily basis and project those decisions out 1, 5, or 10 years into the future, and ask yourself:

  • What kind of physical shape will I be in?
  • Will I have improved my thinking, learning and personal development?
  • How will my relationships with the ones closest to me look?
  • What kind of spiritual condition will I be in?
  • How will my financial health look?

All of these areas of our lives matter and they are influenced by our daily decisions.  Our choices, whether good or bad, may not have an immediate impact for days, months, or even longer, but eventually the compounding effect of these decisions will become noticeable.  For example, if every day we’re making unhealthy decisions, a health related crisis is coming that will demand our attention.  If however, we’re taking care of our bodies and making wise choices regarding our health, we can look forward to a healthy body that will serve us well in the years ahead.

Small daily decisions yield significant results over time.  Where are your daily decisions leading you?

Take in the Experience

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I love to hike, and since I live in the Pacific Northwest of the United States, I’m fortunate to get a large dose of natural scenic beauty on a regular basis.  My favorite hiking destinations are the ones that reward hikers for their effort with a commanding view and breathtaking scenery.  Starting early in the morning on a challenging hike to a much anticipated viewpoint is one of my favorite ways to spend a day.  The anticipation of the view and then finally seeing it with my own eyes is exhilarating.  For me, it’s one of those events that make me thankful to be alive.

Three Sisters Wilderness

Three Sisters Wilderness

One thing I’ve noticed about myself in recent years is that when I reach one of these viewpoints, I immediately begin taking pictures of the scene.  Depending on the view, I can easily take over 100 pictures in my attempt to capture the beautiful scene before me.  I don’t want to miss a single detail!

Inevitably, after several minutes at my feverish picture-taking pace, I begin to hear a voice inside of me saying, “Hey, enough pictures.  Just stop, and take in the experience.”

At that point I put the camera away and just take in the experience with all of my senses.  I literally feast my eyes on the scene before me, noticing shapes, colors, contrasts and myriad other details that I had missed while seeing it through the screen of a digital camera.  I listen to the whooshing sound of the wind as it blows through the tops of pine trees or across the face of a rock-exposed mountain.  I hear the unique sound that a river makes as water curls over a rock and collapses back on itself.  There are also the tactile feelings and fresh smells of the surrounding environment that make for a complete experience.  All of these things I would have missed, had I continued taking pictures.

Those hiking experiences always cause me to wonder what else I may be missing out on in my non-hiking life when I don’t stop and take in the experience.  Where am I busily rushing around, forgetting to stop and enjoy the surrounding environment, event, or people I’m with?  Hiking is good for me in that respect.  It provides me with a mental reset, a reminder to be mindful about taking in the experience, no matter what I’m doing.

What about you?  Are there areas of your life where your too busy “taking pictures” that you’re forgetting to stop and take in the experience?  Start becoming mindful about what you’re doing and who you’re with.  Decide now that although you’ll take some pictures along the way, you’ll also be sure to put the camera down and take in the experience as well.

An Opportunity to Practice

/ Scott / 2 Comments

When I think of someone practicing, I think of a golfer going to the driving range, or in musician dedicating time to practice with their chosen instrument.  But what if you want to work on your human relations and communications skills, or develop some personal habits to live a healthier lifestyle?  How do you practice those skills?

Suppose I told you that you could practice skills like these during the course of your day, without setting aside a specific time to do so.  Interested?  Read on.

Every day we have untold opportunity’s to practice a behavior or develop a habit, simply by actively seeking out opportunity’s to do so.  For example:

  • Do you have a co-worker you struggle to communicate with? See every interaction with that person as a practice session to try a new techniques or method and improve your communication skills.
  • Are you trying to overcome shyness? Look for opportunities to practice overcoming shyness by starting up a conversation with a new person each day, or simply up start by saying “hello” to someone new.
  • What if you’re trying to lose weight or eat healthier? Look at each meal, snack, or craving as an opportunity to practice a healthy alternative.

What personal skills that you’re trying to develop would benefit from more practice?  Have you identified it?  Good!  How look for opportunities in your everyday routine to practice those skills.  However, if you really want to speed up your progress, seek out multiple opportunities every day.

Once you start looking, you’ll find numerous opportunities to practice the habits and behaviors you want to improve.  Before you know it, you’ll find yourself more competent and growing ever-closer to becoming the person you strive to be.

A Compelling Why

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We give up way too easy.  It’s simple to begin a new pursuit or activity, but often, after the fun and excitement wears off, we abandon our efforts and give up.

Perhaps we do this because there are so many things competing for our attention.  As soon as we discover something new, we’re captivated by something else that has caught our attention.  More likely, when we’re faced with actually doing the work, we quickly find out how committed to we really are… or aren’t.

I’ve struggled with starting new ventures and not following through, usually due to 1 or both of the reasons described above.  Now, before I begin a new pursuit, I determine:

  • If I has a compelling reason why I want to do it
  • If I have the commitment, as well as the time, to daily do the work required to achieve success

I’ve decided that I must have a compelling reason; a compelling “Why”.  A reason why I want this?  Without a good answer to that question, it’s too easy to quit before starting or when things start to get tough.  So, without a compelling “Why”, I move on to something else.

Once I’ve decided to start, I gauge my commitment by thinking of the acrostic FOCUS:

Follow

One

Course

Until

Successful

 

This reminds me that it is not about starting new things, but about following through on those things I’ve started until successful.  I find that if I don’t adopt this mindset, I’ll often start a bunch of new ventures but achieve success in few, if any.

 

So what about you?  Do you tend to start ventures and fail to complete them?  It could be you started without a compelling “Why” or even the commitment required to be successful.  If that’s the case, start being aware of why you’re doing something and whether you’re committed to seeing it through to success.  If you are, GREAT!  It’s time to get started.  If not, that’s great too.  Just keep looking for something where you have both a compelling “Why” and the commitment.  Then when you find it, dive in and give it your best.

It’s Time to Give Up…  or Get Creative

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If you’re facing obstacles in the pursuit of a worthy goal, congratulations!  That’s normal.  What’s not normal is pushing through the obstacles with creative solutions.  Many people simply give up when obstacles occur and cease their pursuit, settling for what the way things have always been.

When we face obstacles, it feels like a fork in the road where we can make one of two choices:

  • Get creative and adjust our approach.
  • Return to the status quo.

If you’re pursuing a goal, it’s probably because you’re tired of the status quo.  Therefore this choice should be pretty easy.  It’s time to get creative.

So what are some things we can do to spark creativity, so that we can push through obstacles and challenges?  Here are 3 suggestions:

 

  1. Come up with 10 ideas to a problem every day. This comes from James Altucher on the Ask Altucher podcast, where he says coming up with 10 ideas a day will help you “flex your Idea Muscle” and cause you to become better at generating ideas becoming more creative.

 

  1. Ask for ideas from others. Don’t critique their ideas or say why they won’t work.  Rather use them as building blocks for new ideas that can lead to creative solutions.

 

  1. Read or listen to books, blogs, or podcast that talk about creativity or how people solved problems.

 

One more suggestion to become more creative in the face of obstacles is to remember why you’re in pursuit of your goal in the first place.  Think about what motivated you to get started, and specifically what you’ll give up if you do indeed give up on this pursuit!  Then ask yourself, “Am I fine with going back to the way things have always been?”  For me, the answer is always “No.  I wouldn’t be fine with that.”  This answer provides me with the direction and motivation I need to press on and move ahead.

 

No matter what you’re pursuing, the probability that you’ll face obstacles is high.  Be aware of the certainty of obstacles, when you begin your next goal.  Doing so will enable you to think creatively from the outset about how to will overcome these obstacles when they arrive.

 

 

 

Shut Up or Do Something

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It’s easy to complain, and most people don’t need much practice to get good at it.  Sometimes complaining to the appropriate people is the right thing to do, like when you receive a bad product or service or experience poor treatment from a merchant.  In these circumstances we should complain, but we should always do so respectfully with tact and the right motive.

However, I think we often complain:

  • About people or things that have always been the way they are.
  • About things we have no intention of changing.
  • To any listening ear that is willing to hear us complain.

What good does this do?  How does this benefit you? Complaining like this takes away your power to direct the course of your life and instead fosters a victim mentality.  Unless complaining sparks action, it serves only to ensure you get more of what you’ve always been getting.  It’s also draining to you and others around you of energy and optimism.  Worse yet, it signals to others that you’re not a person of action, but merely a chronic complainer.

Instead of just complaining, try taking action that will improve the situation you’re complaining about. Why allow yourself to be just another complaining voice? The next time you find yourself complaining for the wrong reasons, add the following closing statement to the end of your complaint:  “…and this is what I’m going to do to make it better…”  Then do it!

Try this for the next week and observe the results.  At the very least, you’ll most likely gain a great sense of accomplishment and an improved attitude.  You’ll also find yourself becoming a person of influence, impact, and action.

How to be an Idea Machine

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I’m trying to get better at coming up with ideas.  When trying to envision something that doesn’t exist, or isn’t your current reality, it’s extremely easy to say, “I don’t know” and give up before we even begin to think.  But that response doesn’t cause change or improve your situation.  It merely keeps you where you are, which is fine, unless you’re looking to make a change.

There are 3 truths about generating ideas that I find helpful as I attempt to improve my ability to come up with ideas.  They are:

  1. Most of your ideas won’t be any good. I find this liberating because it frees me up from thinking that all my ideas need to be stellar.  Instead, I can just focus on coming up with a large quantity of ideas for problem.  From that quantity, there he is bound to be something that creates the spark of a good idea.
  1. You don’t need to come up with original ideas. Instead, build on existing ideas.  Take prepackaged salad you get at the grocery store.  There’s nothing new there: chopped up lettuce.  The idea was to do the chopping for the customer so as to be more convenient.  Sounds like a good idea to me!  And from the number of stores that carry bags of chopped up lettuce, I’d say a lot of other people thought it was a good idea too!
  1. You can get better at coming up with ideas. The three best ways I can think of to do this are:
    • Every day, come up with 10 ideas for a problem you’re facing.
    • Read books or listen to podcasts in your area of interest on a daily basis.
    • Be curious about life. Observe similarities between different events, scenarios, or problems.

Life is more fun when you’re engaged and using your mind to chart the course for the life you want to live.  Begin developing your ability to generate actionable ideas and take charge of the direction you want your life to go.  That’s what successful people do.  People like you.

How Will it Affect Them

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Have you ever had something that you wanted to do that you knew would cause stress or anxiety to someone close to you?  What did you do?  How did you make a decision in light of the other person’s anxiety?

I was listening to a podcast this week where a married couple was talking about life stuff and sharing some recent examples from their own marriage.  One of the spouses was planning on getting a tattoo, while the other was really anxious and struggling with the decision, hoping their spouse would not go through with it.  The struggling spouse realized that it was not their decision to make and acknowledged that they had no right to tell their spouse not to get the tattoo.  The spouse getting the tattoo also agreed that it was their decision alone to make.

What struck me about the spouse getting the tattoo was how they didn’t seem have any concern for the anxiety or concerns of their partner.  There didn’t appear to be any consideration given to struggle and stress their other-half was having, and the message that was indirectly communicated multiple times was, “you’re just going to have to deal with it.”

I’m not saying that we need to make all of our decisions based on what other people think.  That would be ridiculous.  However, when we know in advance that our decisions will have a negative impact on those closest to us; I think it warrants some extra thought on our end, and certainly some honest discussion with each other.

Those closest to us are close for a reason.  They’re important to us. We like being around them.  We love them.

When faced with a decision that could negatively impact a loved one, be sure to spend the necessary amount of time communicating, which is both talking AND listening, so you know exactly where they’re coming from.  Based on the feedback you get, and the importance of what you’re considering, you’ll be able to make a decision that, although it may still cause the other person stress and anxiety, will communicate that you wanted and considered their point of view as part of your decision making process.

How to Get Unstuck

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Sometimes I get stuck.  Occasionally, I’ll have a goal I’m working toward, but then I find myself getting stalled out and not making minimal to zero progress for a few days or even weeks.  It’s frustrating! What I’ve discovered recently is that there is an actual force that keeps us from moving forward.  That force is called resistance.

Resistance is anything that distracts us and takes our mind and effort away from moving toward our goals.  Steven Pressfield field wrote a great book about resistance titled Do the Work.  I read this book last week and it was eye-opening to see the role resistance plays in my own life.  The biggest take-away from this book was to be aware of when resistance is blocking my efforts.  When I’m aware of the presence of resistance, I can recognize it for what it is and begin to take steps to push through.

Pushing through resistance is actually fun, as well as motivating, because when I do, it feels like I’m making real progress toward my goals.  The following are some ways you can push through resistance:

  • See the big picture.  Know where it is that you want your goals to take you and have a clear picture of what that looks like.
  • Know why you want to achieve your goal.  Are you frustrated by your current situation, or feel like you need to be doing something better suited to how you are geared?  Whatever the reason, be mindful of it.  Always know the why behind the goal.
  • Understand the cost of not taking action.  Know that nothing will change until you cause something to happen.  No action = no result!  Are you OK if nothing changes?
  • Determine what steps you can take today.  It doesn’t have to be a large step.  Even a small step in the right direction is still a step in the right direction.
  • Just do something!  Commit to taking action every day, whether you feel like it or not.
  • Be motivated by the progress.  After you’ve strung a few days of successful progress together, look back to see how far you’ve come.  Be motivated by the progress and commit that you will not break the chain of daily progress.  You are not required to do everything in a single day, just plan on doing something every day.

It’s now time to punch resistance in the face with clear vision and by taking action on a continual daily basis.  What are you waiting for?  All that separates you from your goal is a thin veil of resistance.  Start punching through today.

 

Have a Plan… but be Ready to Adjust

/ Scott / 3 Comments

I like having a plan.  Whether it’s for a project, an event, or for attaining goals for the year, a plan provides a course of action to get from where I am to where I want to go.  However, in my experience, I’ve realized that even the best plans often need to be adjusted not long after they’ve been started.

That often happens to me with projects at work and events and goals at home. A plan gets created and as soon as it gets started, some change or unexpected piece of information comes to light which causes an alteration to the plan.  It’s the nature of getting from Point A to Pont B in any endeavor.  Unexpected items come up and adjustments need to be made to the original plan in order to continue moving forward.

I used to get really frustrated when this occurred.  It wasn’t until after I realized that change and the unexpected were normal parts of executing a plan that I started becoming less frustrated when adjustment were needed.  Now, when the unexpected comes up, requiring a change to the original plan, it feels normal.  This perspective has allowed me to focus on what adjustment needs to be made rather than being stalled out because I’m too frustrated and focused on the fact that everything didn’t’ go according to plan.

What project, goal, or event do you have coming up that could benefit from a plan?  Whatever it is, create a plan that will take you from where you are to where you want to go, and get started, with the realization that you’ll need to make adjustments along the way.  Knowing this will keep you from getting flustered when plans change and also cause you to experience greater achievement and growth as a result.