Expect to be Successful

Earlier this week I was talking with a colleague who was telling me how they wanted to start riding their bike to work when the weather began getting nicer.  I was impressed with his declaration and told him that his plan sounded like a great idea.  After which he said, “Yeah, but I probably won’t actually do it.  I’ve already got my excuses lined up.”

His comment surprised me.  As I thought about it more, I wondered how often I’ve sabotaged my own efforts to get begin something by having a similar mindset.  If I’ve got a list of reasons or excuses why an endeavor will fail before I even start, how could I ever expect to be successful?  What’s the point of even trying?

It made me think of all the doubt and negative self-talk we can experience when undertaking a new endeavor (or just going through life) and how, just like my colleague’s comment, this kind of talk can sabotage our efforts, dash our initiative, and place a heavy lid on our potential.

Have you ever experienced this kind of action-stopping self-talk?  If so, here are some tools to help you combat this toxic way of thinking in the future:

  • Be mindful of your attitude, thinking, and the language you use.
  • When embarking on a new undertaking, see yourself being successful.  Tell yourself all the reasons why you will succeed.
  • When you think of potential barriers, think also of how you’ll overcome them.
  • Believe you can achieve the goal you’ve set out for yourself.  Not just an “I think I can” mentality, but rather know that you will be successful.  Remind yourself of this often.

We’ll never cause something to happen by holding a mindset that has “already lined up our excuses” for failure.  Remove that kind of thinking from your mind and replace it with thoughts of persevering, overcoming, and achieving your goals.

As many psychologists and speakers have said, we tend to move in the direction of our dominant thoughts.  Let’s all make sure our thoughts are taking us in a direction we want to go.

Cultivating Fallow Ground

Every day I read the chapter of Proverbs from the Bible that corresponds to the day of the current month.  I do this because Proverbs is filled with such practical wisdom and guidance that I can apply in my life the same day I read it.  On February 13th this proverb struck me like it never has before:

“The follow ground of the poor would yield much food…”   ~ Proverbs 13:23 (ESB)

Fallow refers to something that is resting, inactive, or used.  As I read this Proverb, I though not about a fallow or inactive plot of land, but rather about how our thinking, talents, and abilities can also become fallow.  I also thought about how, if I changed my thinking or utilized my talents more, I could be producing greater riches in my life, and not simply from a monetary standpoint but from a productivity and fulfillment standpoint as well.

So why do we allow our thinking and talents to become fallow?  I think it comes down to 3 basic reasons:

  • Fear of rejection.
  • Fear of breaking out of our comfort zone.
  • We try to avoid the struggle and unpleasant feelings and experience that can come from stretching our thinking and offering our talents.

Fallow thinking holds us back, and keeps a lid on our potential and the contribution we can make to our careers, families, and communities.  If your thinking has gone fallow, even if only in a certain area of your life, be encouraged.  Just like a fallow plot of land only needs to be cultivated and tended to begin producing a rich harvest, our thinking and talents can also become productive by simply deciding to begin cultivating them.

Here are 3 steps you can take today to cause something to happen to cultivate your fallow thinking or talents:

  • Identify your talents and offer them in service to others, either paid or unpaid.
  • Change your thinking toward a positive bent.  Instead of initially focusing on the negative or allowing your thoughts to park on what is negative, be mindful of cultivating thoughts that are positive and action oriented.
  • Think of the simple things you need to do that day to move you in the direction you want to go, and then do them, no matter how small.  Do at least one small action per day.

Don’t let your mind or talents lay fallow a moment longer.  Put them to use today and set yourself up for a fruitful harvest in the future.

Does What You’re Doing Inspire You?

I love listening to a good motivational speaker.  The stories and illustrations they share get me fired up and eager to get out, seize life, and aim higher in the goals I’ve set for my life.  It feels good to be motivated.

I also like being inspired.  “Wait a minute!” I can already hear, “Isn’t being motivated and inspired the same thing?”  On the surface, inspiration and motivation appear to be the same.  However, I believe there is a slight but significant difference between the two, and once we understand this difference, we’ll be better equipped to chart a successful course for our lives.

So what is the difference?

Motivation is an external force that comes from seeing an example, reading a book, hearing a great speech, or myriad other sources.  You can be motivated to do things you are neither passionate about nor interested in.  I’m not saying motivation is a negative force.  On the contrary, it can be quite strong, enabling us to do great things.  But it is external, and can be fleeting.  I look at motivation like taking a shower.  You can’t just take one shower and be clean forever.  A shower is good for a while, but before long, you need to take another one if you want to remain clean.  Likewise, motivation is not something that occurs once and then you never need to be motivated again.  It must be regularly sought.

Inspiration, on the other hand, is something internal.  When you’re inspired, it’s like you can’t avoid doing what you’re inspired to do.    You can spend untold time working toward an outcome that inspires you, and giving your best performance for a sustained duration.  To me, inspiration feel like a fire within that provides extraordinary energy to move forward even against huge odds or pushback.

Ok, great.  Motivation and inspiration are different.  So what?

Here’s the important point about knowing the difference between motivation and inspiration:  if you want to cause something to happen in your life that is significant, pursue something that inspires you.

So what thoughts or activities inspire you?  Are you currently trying to pursue a different course in life, and have multiple options to choose from?  If so, pay attention to what motivates you versus what inspires you.  Choose to pursue those things that inspire you and begin setting yourself up for extraordinary success.

Commitment: The Choice is Ours

2014 has arrived!  If you’re like most people you’d probably like this year to be better than the previous year.  Not that 2013 was a bad year.  On the contrary, 2013 may have been a very good year.  It was for me.  Most people I know, however, would like to get better or improve this year from where they were the previous year.  I usually don’t meet people that say, “I want to gain 30lbs in 12 months” or “I really need to take on more debt and neglect my most important relationships this year.”  We usually envision a new year where we make improvements in our lives and get better from where we currently are, no matter where that is.  I think that’ a healthy thing to do, as it provides direction and focus for the next 12 months.

The important question is, “What do I need in order to achieve the goals and dreams I’ve laid out for myself this year?”  Hoping they come about is not enough.  Hope, by itself, is a bad plan because it requires nothing on our part.  By itself, hope is a “wait-and-see” event that usually has disappointing results.  What is needed to reach the goals we’ve set for ourselves in the New Year is commitment.

Commitment is the price that is paid to achieve the goals we’ve set.  It’s what we’re willing to start doing, or stop doing, to cause something to happen that will move us closer to the achievement of our goals.  Commitment is the willingness to say, “Yes” to the events, habits, and behaviors that will cause us to be successful and “No” to the ones that won’t.

Here’s the cool thing about commitment…we get to choose it.  We don’t need “commitment approval” from anyone, but rather we get to choose for ourselves whether or not we are going to commit to paying the price required to reach our goals.  That’s encouraging and empowering to me.  If we know what we want, we need only commit to paying the price required.  The other side of the commitment coin is that we can also decide that either the price is too high or we really aren’t committed to paying the price required.  Either way, the choice is ours.

So what goal or dream do you have that requires commitment?  Do you know the price that needs to be paid to attain it?  Have you committed to paying the price with actions rather than just words?  (That last question is where real movement occurs.  Answer “Yes” to that one, and you’ll soon realize significant progress.)  Once your goal or dream has been identified, commit to it with decisive action and then be on the lookout for the positive results that will surely follow.

Your Roadmap for the Next 12 Months

I love the week between Christmas and New Year’s Day.  All the news stations do a recap of the significant events of the previous year, and most people take a moment to review the events of their own lives over the last 12 months.  As important as I believe this reflection is I also believe it’s only one half of a very important process.  Equally important is looking to what lies ahead in the upcoming 12 months.

I believe that each of us have a tremendous amount of control to design and build the type of year we’d like 2014 to be.  Will things that are beyond our control occurring next year?  Count on it!  But that doesn’t mean that we can’t look ahead, decide what we want out life to look like on December 31, 2014 and take daily steps that move us in that direction.  The greatest tool we can employ to this end is to write down our goals for the year and review them regularly throughout.

Our goals are the roadmap that will guide us through the days of 2014 toward the life we desire.  It is important to know what you want out of the next year, otherwise the year will just drift by and you’ll find yourself 12 months older and no different, or closer to where you want to be in your life, than you were a year ago.

If you want to cause something to happen in your life this year, I suggest writing out goals for yourself in each of the following categories:

  • Family
  • Financial
  • Development
  • Social
  • Spiritual
  • Physical
  • Career

For each of these categories, write out what your goals are for the upcoming yearAnd be specific.  Don’t use phrases like, “Be better about exercising”.  Write out exactly what your goal is like, “Exercise 30 minutes a day 4 times a week” or “Lose 25 pounds by June 3rd”.  Make them specific and measurable with a timeframe attached.  That way you’ll be able to see what kind of progress you’re making.

I’ve found goal setting to be a worthwhile exercise that is both fun and encouraging in building the life you desire.  And don’t get too worried about achieving every goal.  Your goals should be big and require effort without being so easy that success is guaranteed.  Stretch yourself.  Besides, if someone sets a goal to lose 25 pounds by December 1st and they only lose 19, are they a failure?  Not in my book!

Spend some time planning out how you want your life to look next year at this time.  Write down your goals to get you there and review them regularly throughout the year.  Doing so will provide purpose and direction for your life and move you toward the life you want in the upcoming 12 months.

Here’s to your best year ever!

Glacier-like Persistence

I love glaciers.  Living in the Pacific Northwest, I have several opportunities to see them throughout the year.  They’re remarkable objects of nature that come in all sorts of sizes and make up some of the most beautiful, striking, and unique landscapes on the planet.  Still, the characteristic of glaciers that I admire most is their persistence.

Glaciers aren’t the fastest moving things in the world.  In reality, they quite slow.  Even so, a glacier’s movement can forever change the landscape it travels crosses.  A huge valley can be left in a glacier’s wake.  Enormous alpine landscapes are reshaped as a glacier makes its slow decent down a mountain’s face.  The results don’t happen quickly, but the evidence of their steady, persistent progress can be staggering.

Have you ever thought of yourself as a glacier?  No, I’m not asking if you move at speeds that would make a tortoise look like Formula 1 race car, but rather have you ever thought of yourself as a powerful force, which is persistent in applying continued effort in the direction of a long term dream or goal?  Our dreams are usually not achieved in a minute, an hour, or a day, (If they are, then we need to dream bigger!)  Their achievement is usually the result of daily effort applied over a long period of time.  If you observe the results of only a few days spent perusing a long-term goal, you’re likely to be left unimpressed and under whelmed.  If, on the other hand, you look at several weeks, months, or even years of consistent daily effort, you’ll likely to see significant results.  That’s the power of glacier-like persistence, and it’s available to each of us.  We only need be willing to apply it.

What areas in your life could uses some glacier-like persistence?  Is there a habit you’d like to start or stop doing?  Perhaps there’s a lifestyle change you’d like to make.  Determine today what that is for you and commit to making small incremental progress every day.  And not just when it’s convenient, or only when you feel like it, or until you’re tired.  No, instead choose to move ahead with long-term glacier-like persistence, knowing that one day you’ll be able to stand back on look at all that you were able to accomplish.

They’re Automatic

They’re unproductive, they come out of nowhere, and there seems to be an endless supply of them.  And, if you’re not careful, they’ll move in, get comfortable, and be your constant companion.

I’m talking about the negative thoughts that crop up in our minds.  They can be rather insidious, showing up with little notice and focusing our attention away from the good and productive things in life.  It’s scary to me how negative thoughts automatically appear.  All we have to do is let our guard down and they show up and begin to take root.  It underscores the importance of being constantly aware of the thoughts we’re thinking.

The best thing we can do to keep our thoughts in check is to be mindful of what we’re thinking throughout the day.  When we become aware of a negative thought we’re having, we need to cause something to happen and stop the thought and not give it another moment of our attention.  Some helpful ways I’ve found for flushing out a negative thought is to:

  • Replace it with a positive one
  • Say out loud, “I will not think like this!”
  • Pray

I’ve had plenty of experience using all 3 methods.

The longer we allow negative thoughts free reign in our minds, the longer we allow our minds to be poisoned by them.  What’s so dangerous about letting negative thoughts run free is that they will ultimately affect our thinking, which will affect our attitude, outlook and behavior.  Our minds are too valuable to let the decay of negative thought take hold.  Are minds should be guarded like the valuable treasures that they are.

Here’s a challenge for the next 7 days:  Pay attention to the thoughts you’re thinking and instantly squash any that are negative or self-defeating.  After the 7 days are up, continue for another 7 days.  Repeat this process so long as you have a pulse.

Take the challenge offered above and begin uprooting negative thoughts from your mind.  By removing negative thoughts, you’ll be setting the stage to for your mind to flourishing with productive thoughts; thoughts that can change your life for the better.

Know Thy Self

Pop quiz!  Ready?  The question is, “What is the best use of a hammer?”

Let me guess, you probably said something like, “driving nails” or “pounding stuff”.  In fact, I’ll bet the answer sprang up immediately in your mind as soon as you finished reading the question.  Why is that?  It’s because everyone knows what a hammer is designed for and what jobs it does best.

Here’s another question:  Do you know with absolute certainty what you’ve been created to do better than anyone else? I’m not simply asking what you’re good at, but rather, do you know how you are uniquely skilled and gifted so that you can focus your skills on activities that yield your greatest contribution?

I think that each person has a set of talents and skills that are unique to them.  These skills and talents may not seem like a big deal to the person who possesses them.  That’s because they can execute them with ease, almost effortlessly, and do them better than a large majority of people on the planet.  I also think that people are at their best when they are using their unique talents and skills in pursuit of something they feel passionate about.

Are you currently aware of your unique talents and skills?  Do you know what types of activities excite you to want to use your unique skills?  Are you frequently using your unique skills in these activities?

If you answered “Yes” to these questions, congratulations!  If not, here are a couple of things you can do to gain an understanding of your unique skills:

  • Spend some time taking an inventory of all the skills you possess.  If you need some help, I’d recommend reading Unique Ability by authors Catherine Nomura, Julia Waller, and Shannon Waller.  I’m just finishing it and I’ve found this book to be an excellent resource in this area.
  • Determine what moves you, what stirs passion inside you.  Again, Unique Ability is a great resource.
  • List activities you can you engage in that would be a great marriage of your talents and passion.
  • Cause something to happen by engaging your talents and passion in the aforementioned activity.

Much like a hammer, we’re at our best when we’re doing what we were created to do.  As a result, each of us should know exactly what our unique skills are.  Just as assuredly as we know what a hammer is best used for.

Begin taking steps today to identify and utilize your unique skills and talents in an activity that stirs you.  Not only will you feel great doing so, you’ll also be serving others in a way that only you are uniquely gifted to do.

Sample a New Surrounding

I just returned from my first trip to New York City.  WOW!  What a great city!   There was so much to see and experience.  Although we were there for a whole week, we still didn’t have time to do everything on our list.  Regardless, I had a fantastic time and made some great memories.

What I enjoyed most about this trip was showing up as a New York newbie and being able to quickly adapt to life in the city and move about with confidence.  It was fun to experience that transformation.  Prior to this trip, I had no experience in a city of this size, other than what I had heard from the experience of others.  However, within a couple of days of putting myself in the middle of the action, I gained valuable experience on navigating the city and became very comfortable in my new surroundings.  It’s interesting how New York City was a big mystery to me when I first arrived, but after a day it felt very familiar, exciting and exhilarating.

Going to a new place like this can be intimidating.  Fear of the unknown can easily cripple the enthusiasm to travel to new places, or even to try new things and live a life that is full and made interesting by continually stretching and growing.  Yielding to our fear and comfort zone is easy, but it comes with a high price of limited life experience and regret.

This trip also reminded me that we can also gain experience and confidence in other areas of our lives by putting ourselves out there and causing something to happen that is new to us, which has great potential to boost our confidence, as well as our knowledge of the world around us.  It’s simply a matter of getting comfortable stretching your comfort zone.

What areas would you like (or need) to stretch your comfort zone?  Is there a skill you’d like to learn or a class you’d like to take?  Get started today!  Is there a place you’ve always wanted to visit?  Begin making plans to go.  And once you’ve made your plans, put them into action!  Don’t let the fear of the unknown, or the boundaries of your comfort zone keep you from the exciting new experiences and confidence that awaits.

It’s your life, and it’s calling.  How will you answer?

It Feels Good When You’re Done

Some activities that are good for us are a real drag to actually do.  You know what I’m talking about.  Like working in the yard, exercising, making sales calls for your business, cleaning out the garage, studying for a test, and several other just-as-exciting activities.  Getting started on tasks like these can be extremely difficult.  Since we don’t really want to do them, it becomes very easy to procrastinate.  We may be able to get started, only to punch out well before these tasks are completed.  Regardless, we are eager to put off doing these tasks as long as possible, or avoid doing them altogether.

What’s interesting though, is that all of these tasks have something in common.  They make us feel good… when we’re done with them.

Take exercising, for example.  We all know it’s good for us and we should be doing it.  However, I’m sure we can all think of several other things we’d rather be doing than exercising, and come up with several reasons why we should skip exercising today and do it “another day”.

But here’s the thing, when we do decide to exercise and actually see it through to completion, don’t we usually feel better having completed our workout?  Don’t we feel good knowing that we’ve put in the effort to cause something to happen that is good for us?  We may even feel proud of our accomplishment and think, “That wasn’t so bad”.

Just this morning I needed to make some sales calls, but I didn’t feel like doing it.  It’s certainly not my favorite thing to do, so I had to work really hard to keep from talking myself out of making them.  I did, in fact make my calls, and when I was done, I felt GREAT!  It was nice to have that big task checked off my list so early.  In fact, those calls didn’t take nearly as long as I thought they would and there is possibility that they will bear fruit in the future.  I’m glad I made those calls.

So what activity, that you know is beneficial, are you struggling to complete because it isn’t fun to do?  Once you have this activity in mind, think about how good it would feel to actually complete it.  Then, use the anticipation of that feeling to get started on that activity.  Remind yourself how good it will feel when you’re finished.  My guess is that, once you’re finished, you’ll feel better than you thought you would.