Personal Growth

It’s Happening Now

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This week I saw the following statement on someone’s T-shirt:  “Enjoy it because it’s happening now”.

I love this timely reminder!

With the beginning of a new year, it’s common to focus on goals and what we plan on doing in the upcoming weeks and months of 2017.  While looking ahead and planning are indeed both important endeavors, it’s equally important that they not occur at the expense of enjoying the good things we’re experiencing in the present moment.

It seems to me that we create our history, our memories, our relationships, and even cement our legacies by how we choose handle what’s happening to us in each moment.

What kind of memories are we creating when we’re overly focused on the future?  What kind of relationships are we creating when we’re too distracted slow down and connect with the people we love and care about?  How will we be remembered by the people with whom we have the pleasure of crossing paths with?  Will they feel like we were looking over their shoulders to see what was next, or will they feel like we actually cared about and were interested in them?

Once gone, a present moment cannot be recaptured.  We can’t go back and extract enjoyment we left on the table from a moment that has already passed.  We must be mindful to enjoy what’s happening right now.

 

Are You Committed

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With 2017 looming, many people are beginning to express their intentions for the New Year in the form of goals and resolutions.  I love this time of year, because it causes us to pause and think about how we’d like to change our lives to be better in the next 12 months.

While we have no problem expressing our intentions, we often lack the commitment to take action that will move these intentions toward becoming reality.  Dr. Steve Maraboli states:

“Intent reveals desire; action reveals commitment.”

 I would agree.  It’s easy to talk about our desires, because it doesn’t require anything from us.  The more challenging step is to parlay that talk into action, which often requires a potentially uncomfortable or unfamiliar step out of our norm.  Our willingness to take that step is a strong indicator of our commitment to what we say we desire.

Consider this, as you look ahead to 2017; what if the only thing standing in your way of achieving what you desire for the New Year is your willingness to take action?

Are you committed?

Curiosity and Understanding

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A couple of weeks ago my wife and I attended a Moth Mainstage event in Portland Oregon.  The Moth features everyday people who tell stories about their life without using any notes.  It’s just the speaker, a microphone, and the audience.

That night we heard from 5 different storytellers:

  1. A junior speech writer for President Obama
  2. An Australian lady helping her Hungarian boyfriend gain US citizenship
  3. A dad remembering a Halloween after the death of a beloved family pet
  4. The son of a man who died on Mt. Everest
  5. A Sudanese refugee’s journey across Africa, after fleeing from her war-torn country, that eventually led to the United States

Their stories were riveting.

As my wife and I were driving home, discussing what we’d just heard, we were both struck by how hearing someone’s story gave us an understanding as to how they thought about, felt about, and perceived their unique experience.  Even though neither of us has fled a war in our own country, we gained a slight understanding of how someone who has had that experience might feel, simply by hearing this Sudanese woman’s story.

Here’s the best part:  if we ever meet someone who is or was a refugee, we will have a better chance of understanding what concerns or fears they may be dealing with, simply because we were willing to listen to someone else’s similar experience.

I think it’s important to be curious about other people and willing to listen to them in order to gain a better perspective as to how their experiences have shaped their worldview, especially when they are different from us in culture or beliefs.

Be curious as you meet people that are different from you, and be willing to listen to them to understand how their experiences have shaped them.  It’s a great way to build connection with people you meet in the future that may have had a similar experience.

Just Like Snowflakes

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Many years ago, I spent a fall and winter at Ft. Leonard Wood Missouri while attending Army basic training.  Those were some frigid months that gave me a new found appreciation for how frozen vegetables must feel.  During those below-freezing temperatures however, I was blessed to have also seen some of nature’s most beautiful work.

One night after dinner we were lined up in formation to march back to the barracks.  (The Army loves to march!)  As we were standing in the dry frigid air of night, waiting for the drill sergeant to bark out commands to being marching, it began to snow.  I noticed a couple of flakes fall on the soldier’s coat in front of me, and as they did, I couldn’t believe what I saw.  Each individual flake was so perfectly and uniquely shaped, just like you see in Christmas cartoons or beautiful Christmas ornaments.  Never before had I seen an individual snow flake.  Sure, I knew that snow is made of up individual flakes, but this was the first time I had actually seen how detailed, elegant, fragile, and beautiful a snowflake really is.  It was a scene I have never forgotten.

It’s hard to believe that something like a ski slope, a snow covered meadow, a snowy mountaintop, or even an avalanche is made up of millions of unique, individual, beautiful snowflakes.  I think it’s a lot like that with people as well.  It’s easy to just see people as communities, nations, families, organizations, or other large collections.  But what’s interesting to me is that every one of the aforementioned groups is made up of unique, individual, beautiful people.

As you’re moving around in the different groups of people in the weeks ahead, take notice of the individuals that make up those groups.  Look at how unique each one of them is and how their uniqueness adds to the group they’re in.

And don’t forget to look at yourself as well.  You are also unique and valuable to the larger groups you are a part of, and those groups are fortunate to have you.

Flawed People

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Last week I started reading “Alexander Hamilton” by Ron Chernow.  I’ve been amazed at what Hamilton was able to accomplish, regardless of his humble beginnings.  He was a significant figure in the formation of America, and it surprised me that we weren’t taught  more about him in school.

As I read about Hamilton, and many of the other founding fathers of America, I’m struck by the fact that even though they accomplished so many great things, they were all flawed individuals.

It’s easy to look at people who have accomplished great things and think that they have it all together or that they don’t have any challenges, insecurities, or flaws.  It is also easy to look at ourselves and think that we aren’t capable of great things because of our challenges, insecurities, and flaws.  However, Hamilton’s story reminds me that we are all flawed, and that it is flawed and imperfect people that do great things in the world.

Being flawed is not a barrier to doing great things; it feels more like a requirement.

The Voice

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There’s a group of people where I work that get together every other Friday to practice public speaking.  The group leader emails out a couple of topics at the beginning of the week, and each person who would like to speak has 5 minutes to present their topic.  It’s a great opportunity to regularly practice speaking in front of a group.

Although I love the creative process of getting a topic, thinking about what I want to communicate, and crafting my presentation, at some point during the process I briefly think, “I don’t have to talk this week.  I could just pass this time, then I wouldn’t have to do all this work to prepare.”  That’s the voice of fear that thinks it’s easier not to put yourself out there, to play it safe, and not to take chances.

I don’t listen to that voice.  Instead, I double-down on my preparation efforts.

Every time I finish a presentation, there’s a great feeling of satisfaction and accomplishment at having prepared and delivered a good speech.  If I’d have listened to that voice, I would have missed that feeling, as well as the experience that came with it.

We all have that voice, the one that urges us to hold back and play it safe.  And we all have the same freedom: to succumb to that voice’s false warning or to ignore it and press on.

I wonder how much joy, satisfaction, accomplishment, encouragement, innovation, experiences, personal growth, and love in the world is lost every day, because people listen to this voice.

The next time you hear this voice calling you to hold back and play it safe, tune it out, and instead press on and do great things.

Don’t Miss It

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As I was driving to the gym at 5:10 AM on a dark Tuesday morning this week I was fortunate to see an absolutely beautiful natural scene.

The full moon was high in the clear, dark western sky, illuminating a band of clouds that had stacked up along the eastern slope of the Oregon Coast Range.  The moon’s reflected light cast down on the clouds causing them to pop against the black sky with brilliant shades of silver, white, and gray.  The tableau was so striking, so breath-taking and unexpected that I just stopped in the middle of the road to watch it for a moment. (One of the benefits of a small town in the wee hours of the morning.)

As beautiful as this scene was, it would have been easy to miss, had I been too mentally distracted to notice.  I’m amazed at how busy our minds can get, with all the life events that clamor for bits of our mental capacity.  Whether it’s thinking about the people, places, or things in our life, or keeping up with all the technological notifications and alerts we’re bombarded with, our minds can easily become so full that we find ourselves distracted from, if not blind to, the things going on right in front of us.

I hate to think of being too distracted to notice such a beautiful moonlit scene.  But even worse, I wonder what other beautiful things I have failed to notice in my past, simply because I was too distracted to see them.

As we’re going about living active lives, let’s make sure we’re saving some mental capacity to take notice of the beautiful things happening right in front of us.  We never know when a naturally beautiful scene will make a surprise appearance.

Let’s be ready for it!

Dealing With Uncertainty

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No matter where in the world you live, you’ve likely heard the results of the US presidential election.  It’s been a circus and I, for one, am so thankful it’s over.

The emotions people are feeling range from anger to jubilation, disbelief to indifference, and everything in between.  There is a lot of uncertainty and people are wondering just what their country, their home, and the world will look like in the months ahead.  It would be easy to get caught up in all the uncertainty and start worrying about the future, but I think there’s a better way to respond.

Instead of worrying about things that are out of our control, let’s look at ourselves, where we do have control, and choose to:

  • Exercise creativity in our work and our personal lives
  • Love those closest to us
  • Treat those around us with kindness and understanding
  • Learn, explore, and be curious about the world and people in it

These are just a few of the ways among many that we can redirect our energies away from worry of uncertainty and focus them on more meaningful pursuits.  Pursuits that can make your life and the lives of those around you better.

For me, I also take comfort in an uncertain future by knowing that God is never surprised by events and that He is always in control.

As the world looks a little uncertain, let’s remember that we can still have a positive impact in our circles of influence by choosing to offer the best of who we are to those around us.  Although we may not impact the world, we will impact our portions of it.

Of that, I’m certain.

Collecting and Applying New Ideas

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For the last few years I’ve struggled with how I can remember all the great knowledge, insight, and wisdom I read in books.  Sure, I make notes and mark up the pages I read, but isn’t there a better system for cataloging all the great information I read in the course of a year?  Lately, I’ve come to realize that I’ve been asking the wrong question.

Instead of focusing on how I can recall the information I read, what would happen if instead I continued to fill my mind with good ideas, thoughts, and perspectives, and let them influence my thinking?

When I think about it, I really don’t need to get better at recalling information.  That’s Google’s job!  Instead, I should be focusing on how I can improve my thinking a little bit every day.  To do that, I’ve started to approach reading as a treasure hunt for good thoughts and ideas.  It’s pretty easy to identify them, as they often leap off the page.  The question then becomes what do I do with these good ideas once I’ve identified them?

Once I’ve been exposed to a new thought or idea, the best way I know to make use of it is to immediately start thinking where in my life I can apply it.  Underlining or highlighting it in the book and then moving on with the reading doesn’t really help solidify it.  You have to allow time to think or journal about the idea and its application in specific areas of your life.  This will cause the idea to take root and become part of your thought process; a new tool in your “thinking tool belt” that will influence how you think in the future.

I love the quote from Oliver Wendell Holmes that states,

“The human mind, once stretched to a new idea, never goes back to its original dimensions.”

Instead of reading to simply acquire more knowledge, let’s start focusing on collecting and applying ideas that will improve our thought process and mindset over the long term.

And think about this:  How much would your thinking improve in 1 year if you read just one book a month and from each book gleaned and applied 2 good ideas?

Let’s find out!

Get on the Path

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Ever since visiting the Grand Canyon in 2012, I’ve had this goal of doing the Rim to Rim hike.  It’s a hike from the North Rim of the canyon to the South Rim and is a very unique hiking experience with some beautiful scenery.  Many describe it as a bucket list item.  However, aside from wanting to do this hike, I haven’t taken much action to make it happen… until this week.

After talking about it with my wife we sat down, picked some dates and made reservations with a hiking outfitter to do the trip in 2017.  After I made my reservations, and paid my deposit (I had to commit money, so I’m all in!)  I felt great, because I had taken action that will cause this event to happen in 2017.  The part that was so interesting to me was how easy it was to just take action.

I often find myself researching or continuing to think about doing an activity, when instead, what I really need to do is take the step before me.  Put even more simply, I just need to take the action I know I need to take.

After I hit Submit on the on-line registration form, I wondered to myself why it had taken me so long to do this.  If it was that easy to get on the path to achieving this goal, imagine all the other goals I could achieve over a lifetime, if I just take action and get on the path.

How awful would it be to get to the end of life and wonder how different our things could have been if we had only had the courage to take initiative and get started on the path toward doing some things we really wanted to do?

Is there anything you’ve wanted to do, that you keep thinking about, but have yet to take action on?  If so, take action today.  Stick your neck out there and do something that commits you to getting on the path and seeing it through.