What We Don’t Know

We think we know more than we actually do.  Consider the following scenarios:

Scenario What we think
Someone cuts us off in traffic. They are mean-spirited jerks and did that to us on purpose.
Someone is short or rude with us. They are also a jerk, just like the person who cut us off in traffic!  What a jerk.  What a rude jerk!
We reach out to someone via email, text, or phone call and they don’t respond. They must be mad at us.

The “What we think” column sounds rather petty as I write this, but I’ll admit that I’ve often made quick judgments in similar scenarios.   What I’ve discovered is that my quick judgments, like the ones above, are seldom, if ever, accurate.

What if, for example:

  • The person who cut us off in traffic didn’t see us when they were getting over and would have been mortified to know they had done that.
  • The person who was short with me just got a bad medical diagnoses about themselves or a loved one.
  • The person who didn’t respond to an email or text has been preoccupied with an urgent family emergency or has just been busy and hasn’t had the chance to respond, even though they have been thinking about us.

The next time we’re presented with a similar scenario, let’s consider something besides or initial negative judgement; perhaps a response with a little more grace and understanding.  Just like the type of response we’d like to receive.

Just Like Snowflakes

Many years ago, I spent a fall and winter at Ft. Leonard Wood Missouri while attending Army basic training.  Those were some frigid months that gave me a new found appreciation for how frozen vegetables must feel.  During those below-freezing temperatures however, I was blessed to have also seen some of nature’s most beautiful work.

One night after dinner we were lined up in formation to march back to the barracks.  (The Army loves to march!)  As we were standing in the dry frigid air of night, waiting for the drill sergeant to bark out commands to being marching, it began to snow.  I noticed a couple of flakes fall on the soldier’s coat in front of me, and as they did, I couldn’t believe what I saw.  Each individual flake was so perfectly and uniquely shaped, just like you see in Christmas cartoons or beautiful Christmas ornaments.  Never before had I seen an individual snow flake.  Sure, I knew that snow is made of up individual flakes, but this was the first time I had actually seen how detailed, elegant, fragile, and beautiful a snowflake really is.  It was a scene I have never forgotten.

It’s hard to believe that something like a ski slope, a snow covered meadow, a snowy mountaintop, or even an avalanche is made up of millions of unique, individual, beautiful snowflakes.  I think it’s a lot like that with people as well.  It’s easy to just see people as communities, nations, families, organizations, or other large collections.  But what’s interesting to me is that every one of the aforementioned groups is made up of unique, individual, beautiful people.

As you’re moving around in the different groups of people in the weeks ahead, take notice of the individuals that make up those groups.  Look at how unique each one of them is and how their uniqueness adds to the group they’re in.

And don’t forget to look at yourself as well.  You are also unique and valuable to the larger groups you are a part of, and those groups are fortunate to have you.