Inspiration

How Are You Growing?

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What do you look for when you set goals for your life?  What are their attributes?  Are they:

  • Easy to attain?
  • Within your comfort zone?
  • Not too challenging, so as to be assured of success?

If these were the types of goals I had set, or if I hadn’t set any goals at all, the question I’d be asking myself is, “If I’m not challenged, how am I growing?”

Part of growing and getting better at something, or getting better at life in general, is to do things that challenge us.  When we’re challenged by a new thought, goal, or idea, it causes us to do things differently than we have in the past.  That difference often causes discomfort, and that’s good.  While this discomfort is not always enjoyable, many times it is what leads us to the greatest growth and positive change we experience in our lives.

Take getting into shape, for example.  You can go to the gym and keep lifting the same light weights you started with and do the same light-level cardiovascular workout you’ve always done, because it is easy and you know you can do it, but how are does that help you grow in your strength and endurance and cause you to become the healthy individual you desire to be?  Where’s the challenge?  Where’s the growth?

Knowing that when we are challenged, growth occurs, where in your life could you stand to be challenged?  What challenging goals can you set for yourself today that will cause you to grow into the person or life you seek?   Once you’ve set those goals, decide in advance that you’ll persist through the discomfort that will occur when you are challenged, and know that doing so will result in rapid growth toward the person you’re striving to become.

Slowly Coming into Focus

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Our lives should be moving toward something.  That “something” should be the life we envision for ourselves that consists of using our talents and skills applied in service to others, doing something we’re excited about.

Although this sounds good, what if you’re currently not living this life?  What if there’s discouragement caused by the gap between your envisioned life and the reality of your life today?  If that’s the case for you, I have encouraging news.

Here come some obvious truths about achieving our desired life that often get lost:

  1. We need to apply specific and consistent action that incrementally moves us toward our objectives.
  2. It takes time.

I heard the process of creating your desired life described recently as seeing a Polaroid picture coming into focus.  Remember those?  You take a photograph and wait several minutes as the picture comes into focus, revealing the image you just took a picture of.

It’s like that with achieving your desired life.  Most likely, the change from your current situation to where you want to be isn’t going to occur over night.  However, if you’re persistent, your life, like the Polaroid photo, will begin to come into focus and take shape, until it matches the vision you have been persistently pursing.

If you feel like you’re not where you want to be in life at this point take the following steps to cause progress:

  1. Have a vision in your mind of what you want your life to look like.
  2. Take action every day, no matter how small, which moves your life closer toward how you envision it.
  3. Remember that it takes time, so be persistent and stick with it.

Following these steps will not only cause the picture of your desired life to come into greater focus, it will cause the picture to become a reality as well.

Make it Your Own

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“The only limitations you will ever have are the ones you put on yourself.”

                ~Unknown

No matter how often I hear this quote, or any variation of it, it always resonates with me.  It reminds me that anything is possible in my life and that the limits I face are usually the one I place upon myself.

One thing I like doing with a quote I find especially inspiring is to make it my own.  I do this by changing the pronouns so the quote speaks specifically to me.  For example, I could replace all the pronouns with my name and come up with:

“The only limitations Scott will ever have are the ones Scott puts on himself.”

 That’s a little better, but it still sounds like it could be written for anyone in the world named Scott.  A better variation would be:

“The only limitations I will ever have are the ones I put on myself.”

That’s powerful!  When I read this version, there is no mistake that it is directed specifically at me.  However, there’s one more thing I can do to unleash the full power of this truth in my own life, and that is to speak it, out loud, on a regular basis.

When we read a quote or principle like this out loud, we’re not just reading the words; we’re also speaking them and hearing the encouraging words in our own voice.  Great things begin to happen when we begin speaking encouragingly to ourselves.  We don’t need to wait for others to encourage us, we can begin encouraging ourselves today.

What are some of your favorite quotes of encouragement, success, or inspiration?  (If you don’t have a favorite, check out the book of Proverbs.  It’s loaded with enough great principles and quotes to keep you supplied for a lifetime!)

Take the steps below to cause the encouraging words of others to hold specific meaning for you:

  1. Identify or discover 1 or 2 of your favorite quotes or principles.
  2. Determine how you can re-word them to make them your own.
  3. Put the re-written quote somewhere where you will see it every day.
  4. Every time you see the quote, say it out loud to yourself.

Try this for a few weeks.  You’ll be encouraged by a message that’s written just for you.

I’d love to see how you’ve re-written your favorite quote to make it your own.  Place it in the Comments section of this post and share your encouraging words with others.

Continue to Dream

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What do you dream about?  A better question might be, “Are you still dreaming?”  When you envision your future, do you think of your dreams and all the possibilities that lie before you, or do you have thoughts about opportunities lost, time squandered, or the feeling that it’s too late to pursue your dreams?

 

Here some really great news:  there’s’ no such thing as being too old to dream!  We’re not required to jettison all our unrealized dreams when we reach a certain age.  Nor are we restricted from picking up new dreams after a certain birthday has passed.  We are free to dream and pursue those dreams as long as we have a pulse.  That is so encouraging and inspiring to me!  It’s encouraging because it reminds me that life is an adventure to be lived until our very last days, and inspiring because it causes me to realize that each of us should, at all times, have at least one dream that we are actively pursuing.

Dreams give purpose, excitement, and direction to our lives when we are actively thinking about and pursuing them.  The mere acts of having and pursuing our dreams make us interesting as people both to others and to ourselves.  How boring it would be to just drift along without any dreams or ambitions to help guide and direct our lives?

Perhaps you’ve had dreams at one time that you’ve neglected, or maybe you’ve never really given much thought to a dream you have buried inside of you.  If you’ve been distracted from your dreams, reconnect with them today.  If you don’t have any specific dreams, spend the next several days, or even weeks thinking about what you’d like to accomplish with your life.

Once you’ve reconnected with, or defined your dreams, think about them every day.  See yourself working toward your dream and ultimately achieving them.  Then, with this vision in mind, begin making progress every day toward the pursuit and fulfillment of those dreams.

Begin living an interesting life by identifying, visualizing, and finally pursing your dreams.  Today is the perfect time to start.

Remember Your Good Samaritans

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Can you remember a time when you were assisted by a Good Samaritan?  Perhaps you were stuck, lost, in need, or even scarred, and someone came by and offered the very assistance you needed at the very moment you needed it, and they didn’t want anything in return.

I think we’ve all had a moment, or moments, like that.  For me I can think of more than once when I was helped by Good Samaritan, and each time I felt a strong sense of gratitude.  I’ve attempted to show my thanks with some dollar amount, but I’ve always been turned down.  These people just helped me out without expecting, or wanting, anything in return.

I was reminded of the good Samaritans in my life recently when I got to play this role, along with several others, for 2 people who had got their car stuck in some gravel at a trailhead.  We all got together and pushed their car out and they were on their way, extremely grateful that some good Samaritans were there to help them out.

That incident also reminded me of the ability we all have to be good Samaritans in the lives of others.  After we helped the 2 peoples get their car unstuck, I thought about how grateful I was to the people that helped me in the past and felt that in some way, I was paying back their kindness to me by helping someone else.

Try something this week.  Think about the Good Samaritans in you past and be aware of opportunities to honor them by freely helping out someone else in need.  Not only will it make you feel good, you’ll probably encourage them to do likewise for someone else in their future.

 

Leave Room for Someone Interesting

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My wife and I were recently flying from Portland Oregon to Phoenix Arizona on Southwest Airlines.  On Southwest, prior to boarding, you line up at the gate according to your assigned boarding number and select your own seats once you get on the plane.  As we boarded the aircraft, I moved into a window seat and my wife sat on the aisle seat, leaving a vacant seat in between us.  When I asked what she was doing she said the flight wasn’t full and wanted to keep the row of seats to ourselves.

I noticed other people had been doing this also, in an effort to avoid having to sit by a stranger.  After she told me what she was doing, I suggested that she scoot in the middle seat to leave the aisle seat open, because someone interesting might sit there.  She didn’t seem too thrilled with my idea.

As the plane became fuller, her plan began to crumble and she eventually had to move to the middle seat next to me to make room for other passengers.  We were fortunate to have a kind and interesting lady sit next to us that who shared some of her life experience, as well as provided some vacation suggestions for our destination.  We had a great conversation and were able to connect with another human being who we had not even known prior to our flight.  It was a nice way to pass the time.

As we got off the plane, said our good byes, and parted ways, I was thinking about how enjoyable the conversation was and how easily we would have never met that nice lady, had we not left room for her.

It’s easy to keep our guard up and stay detached from people we don’t’ know.  We’re taught as youngsters not to talk to strangers.  This is good when you’re young, but I think as we get older and more discerning, leaving room for opportunities to connect with people we don’t know is crucial to expanding our thinking and connect with other people.  How boring and small our lives would be if we limit our interactions to only those people we already know.  Think about this:  all the people you already know were at one point strangers.

Cause something to happen in your life that leaves room for you to connect with interesting people.  Leave a seat open next to you, greet the person sitting next to you at an event or in line, and smile more.  You’ll create opportunity to connect with and learn from others in ways you wouldn’t have experienced before.  And who knows, you may even meet someone interesting.

We’re Not That Different

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The disappearance of Malaysian Air Flight 370 has dominated the news for several weeks.  This story is especially heart breaking when you begin to think about the family members of the passengers who will never see their loved ones again.  I can’t imagine the pain and grief they must be experiencing.

One recent news broadcast showed some of these family members after they were given news about the search results (or lack of results).  The family members shown on the broadcast were all from China, and experiencing very real and very raw emotional responses to the fact that no one knew where their loved ones were.  Although I couldn’t understand what they were saying, I could tell from their wailing and facial expressions that they were hurting and struggling with the fact that life without their loved ones was becoming a reality.

Seeing these suffering people of another culture half a world away caused me to realize just how similar people of different cultures usually are.  Although the family members on the news spoke a different language and have different customs and norms than I do, they have family and people in their lives that they love.  Just like me.  And when those people are suddenly taken away, they are severely impacted and feel the loss in a painful way, just like I would.

It’s easy to look at people from another culture, or part of the world, and think them strange or weird because they are different from us.  But on a human level, we’re all wired for community and to love and be loved.  In this regard, there is great cross cultural similarity. This commonality is a great place to start building connections and understanding with people of different cultures.

I’m fortunate to have worked with a lot of people from India during my career.  I’ve enjoyed learning about their lives in India, their families, and their culture.  It has really opened my eyes to the world beyond the borders of North America.  Do you work with, or live next to, or regularly cross paths with people from a different culture that you don’t know that well?  If so, here are a few suggestions to help you make a connection and show that you are interested in learning more about them and their culture:

  •          Ask them about their families and how they interact with each other:  siblings, parents, spouses, children, grandparents.
  •          Read a book about their culture and ask them specific questions about something you read that you found interesting or didn’t understand.
  •          Ask them how to pronounce their name and practice pronouncing it correctly.

o   Ask if they have any nick names they prefer being called.

Cause something to happen that broadens your understanding of the world by interacting with people who differ culturally from you.  Remember that they’re people who have loved ones they care about just like you.  It’s a great way to connect with others and to increase your understanding of people on a more global scale.

Who’s Going to Decide

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We all have it, and we all have the ability to decide how we will spend it.  Although we can’t see it, its value is priceless and becomes more so the older we get.  The “it” I’m referring to, is time.

While we do, in fact, get to decide how we spend our time, most of us have several others who are more than eager to help us decide how our time should be spent, and their suggestions are usually focused on advancing their objectives instead of our own.

This doesn’t mean that all requests for our time are bad.  Some requests are welcomed and we’re more than eager to spend your time on it.  Other requests for our time we might not feel like committing to, but we want to support the cause or person asking, so we agree to give of our time.  And other requests neither interest nor benefit us, yet we’re still asked to give our time to it.

The biggest threat to our time is when we don’t have a decision process or priorities in place that help us determine how we’ll invest our time, and instead we simply agree to everyone’s request that comes along, leaving scarce little time for our own pursuits and well-being.

Don’t be afraid to place boundaries around your time.  Cause something to happen that ensures your time is protected by employing these or other boundaries around your time:

  •          Only allocate a specific amount of time, which you determine, to a request for your time.
  •          Decide in advance what causes you will or won’t support with your time.
  •          Decide how much of your time you’re willing to commit to others’ objectives.
  •          Know what’s important to you regarding the direction and goals you’ve set for your life and say “No” to those requests that don’t align.

Your time is a precious commodity. While it’s important, and fun, to spend your time helping and supporting others efforts, be mindful of how you’re spending (investing) your time to ensure that you are also moving closer to what you’ve defined as important in your own life.

Remember that our time is limited and we get to decide how to spend it, so spend it wisely!

Simply Communicate

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Why do we communicate with other people?  What’s the reason for having conversations, writing email, blogs, or even letters?  I think the whole idea of communication to share our thoughts, ideas, and experiences with others.  Ultimately, we all desire to have the people we communicate with understand our point enough to decide to agree with it, disagree, or add to it, thus moving the conversation forward.

One of the best ways I’ve found for being understood by others is to communicate in the most simple, straightforward manner possible.  Now I’m not saying communication needs to be low tech. However, the words, language, and structure of our communication should be as simple as possible to avoid becoming too complex or confusing.

When communicating with others, regardless of the medium, keep the following questions in mind:

  • Are the words I’m using easily understood by the listener or audience?
  • Am I using words or jargon that is confusing or meaningless to my listener?
  • Is there a more simple way to state what I’m saying?

I’m not suggesting that we all dumb down our speech to a 1st grade level (unless, of course, we’re talking to 1st graders).  What I am suggesting is that we be mindful of our audiences and communicate with them in ways that will foster greater understanding of the message and ideas we are attempting to share.

Pay attention to your communication this week and look for opportunities to simplify your message in order to bring greater clarity and understanding to your audience.  You’ll notice an increased ability to cause something to happen when your ideas are clearly and simply communicated.

A Great Place for Having Ideas

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One thing I really like about ideas is how they seem to come out of nowhere.  Think about it, one second your mind is empty, and the very next second, it produces this great new idea that was not in your possession the second before.  I’m amazed and marvel at the brain’s capacity to function like this.

I’m also amazed at the brain’s capacity to quickly forget a great idea.  I’ve often had a great thought and said to myself, “I’ll remember that later and … (insert whatever task I’d do with the idea).”  It makes sense at the time.  The idea is so clear and vivid at that moment, it seems extremely unlikely that I’ll forget what it is.  However, when “later” comes and I attempt to recall the idea, it’s gone.  How can I cause something to happen with a new idea I can’t even remember?  That’s so frustrating!

Earlier this week I was listening to Dave Ramsey’s EntreLeadership podcast with guest David Allen, productivity expert and author of Getting Things Done.  In the podcast he was talking about getting things out of your head an on paper or in a computer.  Somewhere, anywhere other than keeping them in your head, because if you’re trying to remember something you’re using up brain capacity that could otherwise be used for thinking, or focusing on the task you’re currently engaged in.

He made a comment that really resonated with me:  “Your head is for having ideas, not holding them.”

That makes so much sense to me, and has proven true when I’ve applied this principle in my own life.  When I want to recall a fact, event, book I want to buy or read, or any other such piece of information, I’m far more likely to remember it if I get it out of my head and into some other medium like a notepad, application, calendar, or piece of software.  Once I have it out of my head and somewhere else, where I can get to it again, my mind is freed up from thinking (or worrying) about it and can focus on other, more important things.

Hearing David Allen’s quote has caused me to be extra mindful about getting things out of my head in order to turn my mind loose on what it’s better suited for, such as thinking and generating ideas, rather than simply using it for lower level tasks that a sticky note or calendar can perform much better.

Pay attention this week to ideas, thoughts, or events you have that you need to get out of your head and captured somewhere else.  When ideas occur, capture them immediately and develop a system so you can go back and spend some time with them later.  I suspect you’ll be amazed at the treasure your mind regularly produces.