clarity

Know What You’re Getting

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I was talking with a friend this week who was sharing his thoughts on the state of his chosen profession as a chemist.  He was obviously discouraged as he told me about the lack of appreciation, the challenges, and the perceived lack of respect for the profession.  He truly believed that there are no opportunities for chemists in today’s environment and how it would be a grave mistake for young people today to pursue a degree in this field.  He even told how he discouraged his son from choosing this major, although from my friends’ account, his son sounded quite gifted and interested in chemistry.

Afterward, I couldn’t help thinking about my friend’s conversation(s) with his son, giving him his opinion about the future of the field of chemistry.  I believe my friend was trying to help his son make a good choice, but I kept thinking how his opinion about chemistry would shape the life of his son as he chose another career, based on someone else’s opinion, rather than on his on likes and passions.

I’m sure we’ve all experienced something similar.  We receive an opinion from someone we know or trust, and we then make decisions based that opinion.  This can be especially true when the opinion comes from someone close to us.  It can be comforting to get someone’s take on a decision we’re facing.  However, I think it’s imperative that we are discerning enough to know what we’re getting from others and whether it is worth acting on.  More specifically, we should be able to determine if what we are getting is merely an opinion, or if it is real wisdom.  So what’s the difference?  I looked up the definitions of opinion and wisdom, and came up with the following:

Opinion:  A belief or judgment that rests on grounds insufficient to produce complete certainty.

Wisdom:  Knowledge of what is true or right coupled with just judgment as to action.

As we know everyone has an opinion.  These opinions are based on the person’s experience, beliefs and thinking and are often presented as indisputable fact.    Wisdom, on the other hand, is based on timeless principles that are proven true time and again.  While opinions can be valuable, if I’m making a big decision, I want make that decision based on wisdom, rather than merely someone’s opinion.

We don’t want to give up what we’re gifted and passionate about because of someone else’s opinion.    Therefore, we need exercise discernment to know whether what we’re getting is an opinion or wisdom.  If it’s an opinion you’re getting, take it with a grain of salt and determine to make up your own mind on the matter.  However, if it’s wisdom you’re getting, perk your ears up, pay attention, and look for ways to apply the wisdom to your situation in order to cause something to happen in your life.

Begin paying attention to your conversations this week and in the future in order to more accurately assess whether you’re getting opinions or wisdom.  Not only will you’ll feel liberated by being able to tell the difference, you’ll also be better equipped to make wise decisions in your life.

 

 

 

Commitment: The Choice is Ours

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2014 has arrived!  If you’re like most people you’d probably like this year to be better than the previous year.  Not that 2013 was a bad year.  On the contrary, 2013 may have been a very good year.  It was for me.  Most people I know, however, would like to get better or improve this year from where they were the previous year.  I usually don’t meet people that say, “I want to gain 30lbs in 12 months” or “I really need to take on more debt and neglect my most important relationships this year.”  We usually envision a new year where we make improvements in our lives and get better from where we currently are, no matter where that is.  I think that’ a healthy thing to do, as it provides direction and focus for the next 12 months.

The important question is, “What do I need in order to achieve the goals and dreams I’ve laid out for myself this year?”  Hoping they come about is not enough.  Hope, by itself, is a bad plan because it requires nothing on our part.  By itself, hope is a “wait-and-see” event that usually has disappointing results.  What is needed to reach the goals we’ve set for ourselves in the New Year is commitment.

Commitment is the price that is paid to achieve the goals we’ve set.  It’s what we’re willing to start doing, or stop doing, to cause something to happen that will move us closer to the achievement of our goals.  Commitment is the willingness to say, “Yes” to the events, habits, and behaviors that will cause us to be successful and “No” to the ones that won’t.

Here’s the cool thing about commitment…we get to choose it.  We don’t need “commitment approval” from anyone, but rather we get to choose for ourselves whether or not we are going to commit to paying the price required to reach our goals.  That’s encouraging and empowering to me.  If we know what we want, we need only commit to paying the price required.  The other side of the commitment coin is that we can also decide that either the price is too high or we really aren’t committed to paying the price required.  Either way, the choice is ours.

So what goal or dream do you have that requires commitment?  Do you know the price that needs to be paid to attain it?  Have you committed to paying the price with actions rather than just words?  (That last question is where real movement occurs.  Answer “Yes” to that one, and you’ll soon realize significant progress.)  Once your goal or dream has been identified, commit to it with decisive action and then be on the lookout for the positive results that will surely follow.

Know Thy Self

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Pop quiz!  Ready?  The question is, “What is the best use of a hammer?”

Let me guess, you probably said something like, “driving nails” or “pounding stuff”.  In fact, I’ll bet the answer sprang up immediately in your mind as soon as you finished reading the question.  Why is that?  It’s because everyone knows what a hammer is designed for and what jobs it does best.

Here’s another question:  Do you know with absolute certainty what you’ve been created to do better than anyone else? I’m not simply asking what you’re good at, but rather, do you know how you are uniquely skilled and gifted so that you can focus your skills on activities that yield your greatest contribution?

I think that each person has a set of talents and skills that are unique to them.  These skills and talents may not seem like a big deal to the person who possesses them.  That’s because they can execute them with ease, almost effortlessly, and do them better than a large majority of people on the planet.  I also think that people are at their best when they are using their unique talents and skills in pursuit of something they feel passionate about.

Are you currently aware of your unique talents and skills?  Do you know what types of activities excite you to want to use your unique skills?  Are you frequently using your unique skills in these activities?

If you answered “Yes” to these questions, congratulations!  If not, here are a couple of things you can do to gain an understanding of your unique skills:

  • Spend some time taking an inventory of all the skills you possess.  If you need some help, I’d recommend reading Unique Ability by authors Catherine Nomura, Julia Waller, and Shannon Waller.  I’m just finishing it and I’ve found this book to be an excellent resource in this area.
  • Determine what moves you, what stirs passion inside you.  Again, Unique Ability is a great resource.
  • List activities you can you engage in that would be a great marriage of your talents and passion.
  • Cause something to happen by engaging your talents and passion in the aforementioned activity.

Much like a hammer, we’re at our best when we’re doing what we were created to do.  As a result, each of us should know exactly what our unique skills are.  Just as assuredly as we know what a hammer is best used for.

Begin taking steps today to identify and utilize your unique skills and talents in an activity that stirs you.  Not only will you feel great doing so, you’ll also be serving others in a way that only you are uniquely gifted to do.

It Feels Good When You’re Done

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Some activities that are good for us are a real drag to actually do.  You know what I’m talking about.  Like working in the yard, exercising, making sales calls for your business, cleaning out the garage, studying for a test, and several other just-as-exciting activities.  Getting started on tasks like these can be extremely difficult.  Since we don’t really want to do them, it becomes very easy to procrastinate.  We may be able to get started, only to punch out well before these tasks are completed.  Regardless, we are eager to put off doing these tasks as long as possible, or avoid doing them altogether.

What’s interesting though, is that all of these tasks have something in common.  They make us feel good… when we’re done with them.

Take exercising, for example.  We all know it’s good for us and we should be doing it.  However, I’m sure we can all think of several other things we’d rather be doing than exercising, and come up with several reasons why we should skip exercising today and do it “another day”.

But here’s the thing, when we do decide to exercise and actually see it through to completion, don’t we usually feel better having completed our workout?  Don’t we feel good knowing that we’ve put in the effort to cause something to happen that is good for us?  We may even feel proud of our accomplishment and think, “That wasn’t so bad”.

Just this morning I needed to make some sales calls, but I didn’t feel like doing it.  It’s certainly not my favorite thing to do, so I had to work really hard to keep from talking myself out of making them.  I did, in fact make my calls, and when I was done, I felt GREAT!  It was nice to have that big task checked off my list so early.  In fact, those calls didn’t take nearly as long as I thought they would and there is possibility that they will bear fruit in the future.  I’m glad I made those calls.

So what activity, that you know is beneficial, are you struggling to complete because it isn’t fun to do?  Once you have this activity in mind, think about how good it would feel to actually complete it.  Then, use the anticipation of that feeling to get started on that activity.  Remind yourself how good it will feel when you’re finished.  My guess is that, once you’re finished, you’ll feel better than you thought you would.

There’s Only Learning

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Like a lot of people, I love learning new things.  There’s something cool about starting out not knowing anything about a topic, spending time learning about it, and then having an understanding that I didn’t have when I started.  What’s even better is applying what I learned and seeing positive results.  That’s the true value of learning.

But what about failure as it relates to learning?  Have you ever thought of failure as a necessary step in the learning process?  No one likes to fail.  It makes us feel clueless, ignorant, worthless, or a whole host of other self-defeating feelings.  I would guess that many people don’t even risk applying what they learn, or even attempt to learn new things, in order to avoid failure and all those negative feelings that come with it.  We potentially miss out on so much because we’re afraid to fail.

What if we change our mindset to view failure not as a shameful and defeating event, but instead see it as a form of learning?  Multiple times in the past several weeks I’ve heard the phrase “There is no failure, only learning”.  That’s powerful!  When we first set out to learn something new, we already know and accept the fact that we are clueless, ignorant, and worthless in that subject.  And we’re fine with that.  Why?  Because we know that is the starting point of all learning.  We show up with nothing.  We also know that, as a result of learning about our chosen topic, we won’t be that way for very long.  As we begin to apply what we learn, we soon find that we are becoming competent, knowledgeable, and valuable in our chosen topic.

Isn’t failure just part of the learning process, helping us discover what works and what doesn’t?  If so, shouldn’t failure be seen as a crucial part of the learning process?  I think so.

Don’t let the fear of failure keep you from attempting to cause something to happen.  See it as a natural part of your learning process.   And always remember, there is no failure, only learning.

Your Word of the Year

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We all have our favorite quotes, phrases, and sayings that we recall when situations warrant.  These can range from words our parents used to utter when we were growing up, to familiar quotes from famous people, or even words of Scripture.  They offer comfort, encouragement, and familiarity in our busy, ever-changing lives.

Instead of a quote, have you ever considered being motivated by a single word?  At the end of 2011 I was looking back on the passing year, as well as subsequent years, in order to gain perspective as I considered how I wanted 2012 to take shape.  My reflections on 2011 revealed that I was often going through my days on auto pilot.  The majority of my responses to events and people were automatic and required little thought on my part.  That’s no way to live an exciting, fulfilling life.  I knew I wanted to do better in 2012.  I wanted to live more intentional than automatic.

As I was thinking about this, the word “mindful” sprang into my thoughts.  I my decision making, planning, and interactions with people I want to be mindful of my actions and responses.  Being on autopilot was no longer good enough.  I needed to mindfully decide how I would live my life in 2012.  That meant giving thought out answers to questions for others instead of knee-jerk, cliché responses.  It also means taking an active role in building existing relationships with family and friends, instead of waiting for others to take the initiative to do so.

Being mindful also reminded me to “be there” no matter what I was involved in.  Be present in the current situation whether it’s a meeting at work, a conversation with a friend, reading the Bible or praying, or just doing life with my wife Mickey.  Value the present moment, and be there.

I enjoyed the focus and positive attitude the word “mindful” created in my life in 2012 that I decided to make it my word for 2013 too.

So what’s your word for the year?  What’s that one word that will remind you how you want to live life as you continually cause something to happen this year?  Spend some time thinking about what your word will be and then apply that word to all facets of your life as you live out this year.

Don’t Shortcut the Process

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High school Spanish class seemed like an eternity ago.  Probably because it was!  At the time I wasn’t motivated and I really couldn’t see the value in learning a new language.  It wasn’t until several years later, in 2011, that I decided to learn Spanish at the local community college.  This time I was motivated, because I had more opportunities to use Spanish than I did in high school.

My thought was that I would quickly pick up and be speaking Spanish semi-fluently in a few short weeks.  After the first class, I realized it was going to be a longer pursuit than I thought.  There was no quick fix for learning Spanish, short of total cultural immersion.  Even that would have taken significant time.  I was presented with the realization that learning Spanish is a process.

Most worthy pursuits in life are like that.  There is a process to their achievement and mastery.  A shortcut rarely exists.  How, for example, would you shortcut the process of raising healthy, productive children?  Could that be done over a couple of long weekends, or in a few short days?  What about earning a degree or becoming proficient at a skill or profession?  Does a person earn a college degree in a week?  Are significant weight loss goals achieved in a couple of hours?  Hardly.

So why then are we surprised that our big goals, dreams, and desires should take any less time?  Are we so hungry for instant results that we’ll ignore known processes for success because they take commitment over an extended period of time?  Sure, we read about the individual or business that seems to have “made it overnight”.  What you’ll rarely hear about are all the countless weeks, months, or years they repeatedly followed a process in order to become an overnight success.

I’ve learned that you can’t shortcut a process.  You can take steps to speed up the process, like devoting more time to practice and preparation.  You can avoid common mistakes by talking to people who have already followed the process and can point out common pitfalls.  You can even give up on the process; deciding that it’s just too hard.  (If you’re reading this blog, I don’t think that’s a choice that sounds very appealing to you.)  The one thing you can’t do is reach your goals by short-cutting the process.

The process is the road we travel as we pursue our goals and dreams to reality.  It’s continually making the choices that move us in the direction we want to go.  We build this road daily by repeatedly causing something to happen that will move us closer to our goals and dreams.

As you set out to do great things, realize that there is a process to get there.  Embrace it, and don’t attempt to shortcut it.  You’ll be amazed by the power of the process.

3 Simple Steps That Cause Something to Happen

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I’m a big fan of Columbia Sportswear Company in Portland Oregon.  They have great clothes for outdoor activities like hiking, fishing, snow shoeing, or just for wearing around town.  If you need clothes for the great outdoors, Columbia has got you covered

Fortunately for me, I’m relatively close to several Columbia outlet stores.  These stores are great!  They sell Columbia gear (obviously) at prices far lower than you’d pay at a full retail sore.  If I’m anywhere near a Columbia outlet, I am instantly drawn to the parking lot and into the store.  I can’t help it.  It’s like the mother ship is calling me home.

Every time I enter a Columbia store, my first several seconds are spent in a state, where I’m overwhelmed by all the choices in the store, and don’t know where to start looking first.  I usually begin by halfheartedly looking at one section, and then quickly jumping to another, before I finally calm down and think about what I need, or want, and then start looking around with focus and purpose.

It can be like that when deciding on a big goal or challenge we’d like to pursue.  We’re motivated and fired up at the thought of a new endeavor.  However, we quickly become overwhelmed, or even immobilized, by the scope of our undertaking and don’t know where to begin “causing something to happen”.   If we stay in this state too long, our motivation and enthusiasm will soon leave the scene, and our desire or goal will be relegated to the domain of wishful thinking.

So how do we avoid this?  What can we do to gain clarity in our thoughts and direction so we can determine what we need to do to get started, on whatever pursuit we set for ourselves?  I believe there are 3 simple steps we can take to move us forward.

Step 1: Decide where it is you want to go.

It may sound obvious, but if we don’t know where it is we want to go, or what it is we want to achieve, we’ll become unclear as to what actions we should take, causing confusion, frustration, and discouragement on how we should move forward.

I have applied these steps in my own life.  In 2012 I decided that I wanted to get into doing voice overs professionally.  This was clearly the goal I had set for myself and the direction I wanted to go.  Step 1 had been decided.  I knew where I wanted to go.

Step 2:  Determine where you are currently, in relation to where you want to go.

This step is important because it helps determine the starting point of the journey.  It’s like planning a road trip.  Everything begins with your starting point, right?  You determine how long the trip will take based on how far your destination is from the starting point.  The potential route you’re going to take is all predicated on where trip begins.  It’s no different with a goal or desired achievement.  The planning begins with determining your starting point.

After I had set my goal of doing voice overs professionally, I took stock of where I was.  It didn’t take long to realize that I was as far away from doing voice overs as I could get.  I didn’t know anything about the industry or how it worked.  I had no knowledge of how voice over artists operated or how a person goes about becoming a voice over talent.  All I had were some decent public speaking skills, an eagerness to learn, and a good attitude.  I knew where I currently was.

Step 3:  Take the next (or first) step.

This is where you cause something to happen.  Once you know where you are and where you want to go, it’s time to determine what that next small step is that will move you toward your goal.  Once you know that next step, TAKE IT!

For my voice over pursuit, I realized that I needed to learn how people get started in the voice over industry.  So I took the next step of researching how people get started.  Once I learned that people got started by getting trained in voice over techniques, I took the next step of researching trainers and coaches.  I again took stock of where I was, and knew I needed to get trained by a voice over coach.    The next step was to find a voice over coach and sign up for training, so that’s what I did.  I am currently in the process of completing my initial voice over training, but I’ve already begun looking ahead at what my next step will be.

These 3 simple steps keep our focus on what we should be doing right now.  As we move toward a specific goal, we should constantly ask ourselves:

  1. What do I want?
  2. Where am I right now?
  3. What’s my next step?

This simple process eliminates confusion and frustration that come from a lack of clear focus and direction.  It’s a simple process, and it works.

What about you?  Where are you right now and where would you like to go?  What’s the next step you need to take today, to cause something to happen that will move you closer toward your goal?