Personal Growth

Celebrate

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This time of year is filled with celebrations.  From end of school years, to high school and college graduations to Fathers Day, there is much cause for celebration.  Let’s make sure we’re taking time to do so.

I’m rather task oriented, so I like to be productive and check things off my list.  As such, it is very easy for me to look at what’s next, rather than stopping for a moment and celebrating milestones.  This is an area where I’m trying to be more intentional.  When we rush past celebrations, we rob ourselves of the joy that celebrations bring, especially when that celebration is done with others. 

Are there events you should be celebrating?  Is there a cause for celebration in your future, or in the future of someone you care about?  If so, don’t rush past it.  Take a break and celebrate.  And don’t worry, the items on your task list will be waiting for you when the celebration over.

A New Story

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As part of the work I do, I’m required to occasionally take proficiency exams related to the software we use.  Even though exams are multiple choice, they aren’t easy.  They require significant study and focus.  I usually do pretty good on multiple choice tests, but that wasn’t always the case.

Back in college, my multiple-test-taking-ability was not very good.  One of the main reasons why was because I use to tell myself, “I’m not any good at taking multiple choice tests.”  If I didn’t immediately know the answer to a question on a test, I’d usually just guess.  As you can imagine, this didn’t lead to great test scores.  It also reinforced the story I’ve been telling myself about how bad I was at test taking. 

When I first realized that exams would be a regular part of my tenure in my current position, I was worried.  Then I started thinking about why I was bad at test taking, and realized it wasn’t a sentence, but rather a story that could be changed.  So, I changed the story I was telling myself about my test taking abilities.  I started telling myself that, “I will easily pass tests on the first try because I will be prepared and will critically think about the answers I give, versus just guessing.”

Just like I became a poor test taker, because of the story I told myself in college, I have now become a good test taker who is prepared and easily passes because I decided to tell myself a different story about who I was.

Do you have story you’ve been telling yourself that hasn’t been serving you well?  If so, consider telling yourself a more encouraging story, and then start living into it. 

We Get To Decide

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Just a quick reminder this week, that we get to choose how we respond to events in our life. 

It’s easy to think that we can’t help ourselves, or to blame others (or our emotions) for how we respond to the stimulus in our life.  While we can blame, the truth is, we get to decide how we respond.

Let’s decide, and then follow through, on making good choices. 

Challenging But Worth It

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I’m going to talk about one of Jesus’s principles this week, so be warned.  If that’s not your thing, come back next week.  😊

“If you only love the loveable, do you expect a pat on the back?” Luke 6:30 Msg.

It’s easy to love those who love, us, or to be kind to people who are kind to us.  However, Jesus teaches that we’re also to be kind to those who aren’t kind to us.  And to love those who don’t love us.  This is challenging teaching.  It’s even more challenging to put into practice.

I’ve had the “opportunity” to put this teaching into practice with a couple of people for the past 11 months.  It has, indeed, been challenging, but I can also report that with prayer and commitment to Jesus’s teaching, it has gotten a little easier.  Not easy, just slightly easier that it was 11 months ago.

Jesus’s teaching is for our benefit, because he wants what’s best for us.  Following this particular principle has kept my heart from festering with disdain or hate toward others, and has instead caused me to regularly cast my gaze toward Jesus for his assistance, strength, and peace.  All of which I have received.

So, while it’s been challenging, I can also report that it’s been what’s best for me.  I have peace instead of anger, and gratitude for His teaching instead of animosity toward others.

It’s a nice place to be.

Benchmarking

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This week I’ve been reading one of my journals from 2015.  Reading old journals is like being in a time machine, because I can read what I was thinking in that particular moment and also know how things turned out 8 years later.  Journaling is a great way to establish benchmarks (where we currently are) and our goals/destinations (where we want to go).   

I was encouraged to see that for several of my personal growth destinations I was writing about, I was able to arrive at the destination envisioned at the time.  This was reassuring, as I was able to read my thought process and understand my desire, as well as actions to take, to get there.

My journals also revealed that I have areas that I wanted to improve on back in 2015, that I’m still working to improve at in 2023.  I was encouraged that there are areas of growth that were important to me then that are still important to me today.  And while my improvement has been slow, I still have the desire to improve moving forward.  My journaling from 2015 is still motivating me to continue to grow and improve, today and beyond.

Are there any areas in your life where you’d like to improve?  If so, I strongly suggest journaling about where you are, and where you want to go in life.  If journaling isn’t your thing, I’d suggest at least writing down the areas you want to improve, and what that improvement looks like.  This will provide a wonderful benchmark for your future self, so that they will know if they are on track or need to recalibrate.  It will also make for a nice conversation with yourself at a future date.

Lift Or Limit

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As I was journaling this morning, I was reminded how our self-talk can limit or lift how we see ourselves.  Think about that, the words you tell yourself, about yourself (whether audibly or simply thought), have a direct impact on how you feel and think about who you are.

Taking this thought a little further, what we think/feel, about ourselves, will influence our actions.  And, the actions we consistently take are what shapes the lives we ultimately build for ourselves.

The question that feels like it needs to be asked is, “Do you like what you’ve built?” 

If your answer is, “Yes”, great!  However, if your answer is, “No”, it might be reflecting on you’ve talking to yourself to discern if there’s any negative thoughts or talk you’ve regularly had with yourself.

It might even be time to start a new, positive conversation with yourself… because you’re worth it.

Plan For It

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Several years ago, my wife and I opened a savings account and titled it, “Travel”.  It’s where we regularly save money for the sole purpose of traveling.  Not only does having this account show that we prioritize traveling and getting away together, it gives is the freedom to go somewhere on short notice, or add a day or two to our existing plans.  It’s given us the freedom, as well as the encouragement, got travel.

If something is important to us, we need to plan and execute to make it happen.  Whether it’s setting aside time, money, or some other resource, our planning and execution shows our true level of commitment.  If we say we want to do/have/become/change something, yet we haven’t taken any steps to bring it about, that may tell us quite a bit about how committed we actually are.

Is there something you want to do/have/become/change?  If so, begin planning for it.  Then, follow up on those plans with specific action.  That “something” awaits.

Take A Closer Look

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Last night after work my wife and I went to the national wildlife refuge by our house to look at the birds in the area.  (There is a nesting pair of bald eagles that has been cool to see!)  At first glance, when we pulled up to the big duck ponds, it appeared that they were full of the regular birds you see all the time.  After a closer look, that turned out not to be the case.

As we combed through the crowd of ducks with the binoculars, we started noticing out-of-the-ordinary birds we hadn’t seen before were also part of the mix.  We saw a Green Winged Teal, a Cinnamon Teal, and a Ringed Neck duck.  It was amazing to me how much variety there was hidden within the crowd.

That experience got me thinking that it’s probably a lot like that with how we see the world around us.  Do we see all the negative things happening, or are we on the lookout for the good being done.  Are we on focused on just what’s popular and mainstream, or are we looking at other forms of music, film, literature, people, food, and experiences? 

There’s a lot of different and interesting things in the world that can be easily missed, unless we slow down and take are time to have a closer look.

Before You Say No

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My cousins were in town this week, and Thursday evening one of them text me to see if I’d be available for lunch on Friday.  My first thought was that I would be working that day.  After about 2 seconds I said, “Lunch sounds great!”  We all had a great time.

I share that little story as a reminder not to be too quick to say, “No”.  We can always find reasons not to do something, but we can just as well find reasons to engage, especially when it has to do with building relationships. 

In 10 years, I won’t remember what I would have done at work for those couple of hour, if I had said “No” to lunch with my cousins.  However, I’ll never forget the time we had.

I made a good choice!

Grateful For The Example

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I was listening to a podcast recently about the book, “Up From Slavery” by Booker T. Washington.  The positive attitude Mr. Washington possessed, both during and after facing terrible social injustices, blew me away.  I’ve since gone to the library and checked out this book so I can read it for myself.

Based on a few of excerpts from the book, that were read on the podcast, I was struck with how Washington chose positivity, focus, and growth, when he could have easily chosen bitterness, anger, and apathy.  Regardless of what happened to him that was outside of his control, he was focused on becoming a certain type of person.  Excuses were shattered by him, and circumstances were simply part of the landscape he had to navigate to get where he wanted to go.  Quite simply, the guy was remarkable.

Washington reminds me that if he can become a positive man of character, in spite of all the roadblocks and injustices he’s faced, then what excuse do I have not to do likewise?  I’m grateful for his example.