Choice

Having Each Other’s Back

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Last weekend as I was leaving the grocery store, I saw a man in the parking lot who had locked his key in his car, and was trying to retrieve them through his partially opened window.  From what I saw, it was obvious that he wasn’t going to be successful.

I then noticed another person, who had also seen what was going on, walk up to the guy’s car and offer to help.  This person apparently had smaller arms than the owner of the car, because they were able to rather quickly retrieve the keys from the car.  Apparently, the car owner’s dog was also locked in the car, so I’m sure the dog was as happy to be set free as the owner was to have his keys!

Although this may seem to be a small act, I’ll bet the owner of the car didn’t think it was. 

Let’s be on the lookout for simple ways we can “have someone’s back” who needs assistance.  If we were in a similar situation, wouldn’t we want someone to have ours?

Cause It To Happen

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By the time this blog is posted, I’ll be back from a trip to the San Juan islands in Washington state.  This is some place we’ve wanted to go for many years, but other destinations have always taken priority.  This year however, we decided to make it a priority and pay a visit. 

I’m amazed by how many cool places are in our back yard (relatively speaking) that we haven’t seen yet.  I’m also amazed how easily these places can be deprioritized simply because they are so close.  Like most things, it takes intention to actually get to them. 

Is there anything that is relatively close to you (geographically or otherwise) that you’d like to experience that you haven’t yet?  Perhaps now is the time to cause it to happen.

A Reminder

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This week I finished listening to the audio book “E.R. Nurses”, in which about two dozen ER nurses describe some of their experience.  It was eye-opening!

I work as an IT person for a hospital, so I am a little familiar with and emergency department.  However, I had no idea of the scenarios these nurses have on a regular basis.  The biggest thing that stood out for me was how often they have to jump from one tragic event to another, without much time to process what happened.  I am grateful for these nurses and the work they do.

The book reminds me that I often have no idea what struggles and challenges people are facing on a daily basis.  In light of that, I’m also reminded that I would do well to show grace to others. 

Slowing Down

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Based on a recommendation, I recently started reading the book “Mindfulness” by Gill Hasson.  One thing I realized, even before finishing the book’s introduction, was that I would have to slow down when reading this book.

Even in my early reading of this book, I found myself re-reading sections, marking passages and making notes in the margin.  There are also parts that are good for reflection and journaling.  None of this would be possible if I didn’t slow down.  In the case, the object is not to turn pages as quickly as I can, but rather to get the most out of the book that I can apply in my life.

I think there are many instances where we would do well to slow down.  Perhaps we should slow down in our interactions with those important to us and actually listen to what they saying and be present in our conversations.  We could even throttle back our pace and take greater notice of our surroundings, noticing the beauty that becomes invisible at speed.

Are there any areas in your life where you might benefit from slowing down?  If so, give it a try.  You might just be surprised by what you notice.

Find Out For Sure

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One thing my wife and I like to do is visit farm/fruit stands and mills that grind their own grains.  On Friday we went to visit a mill that we had found online in a nearby town.  When we showed up the place looked like a warehouse and not some place that would sell grains and flour to the public.  It would have been easy to drive off, thinking they didn’t sell to walk up customers, had my wife not said, “Let’s go in and find out.”  I’m glad she suggested we find out for sure!

When we went in and asked if they sold to the public, we were introduced to Polly, who generously told us about the different kinds of grains, flour, and even pasta that they had, and how best to use them!  She was extremely helpful and encouraged us to reach out if we had any questions about any of their product.

I tend to read situations and make judgements rather quickly.  (Ex. “This looks like a warehouse.  I’m sure they don’t sell to the public.”)   My wife, however, is more likely to challenge assumptions, situations, and judgements and take the attitude of, “Let’s find out for sure.” 

I’m grateful for this perspective.  Without it, we would have missed a fun experience, not to mention interacting with a nice person!

Be on the lookout for quick judgments or assumptions you making that make be incorrect, and then go find out for sure.

Reaching Back

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This week at work, I had the opportunity to help a colleague use some software that I am very familiar with.  As I was helping him, I thought about my own journey, when I was learning what he was currently asking about.  I felt grateful to be able to help a colleague.

It’s important to remember our early struggles to gain experience.  Whether it’s being an adult, starting out in a career, marriage, parenthood, or just life in general, we’ve all gained some experience that someone coming behind us would be interested acquiring.

With that in mind, let’s be eager to share our experience with those who are seeking assistance, and can benefit from the experience we have. 

They Can Both Be True

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We like black and white absolutes.  This is good and that is bad.  This person is nice, that person is mean. 

We like these absolutes because their easy to understand.  However, as you’ve probably notice, no everything is so black and what.  In fact, sometimes opposing realities can exist at the same time.

I have a friend whose dad passed away on Christmas day several years ago.  In his case, is Christmas day a good day or a bad day?  Is it a day to look forward to or a day to anticipate with grief.  Is it filled with joy or sadness.

The answer is, “Yes”.

Sometimes the comfort and certainty of black and white is replaced with diametrically opposite realities.  In my friend’s case, Christmas can be a day of great joy, while at the same time being a day of sadness and loss.     

I’ve found in my own life that it’s helpful to acknowledge scenarios when two or more opposite realities are true at the same time.  Beyond just acknowledging, it’s also helpful to learn to hold those 2 realities at the same time.  One doesn’t have to be true while the other is false.  They can both be true at the same time. 

They’re Not Worthless

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I was having a conversation this week regarding someone’s professional performance.  Truthfully, their performance appears to be below standards with regard to follow through and customer service.  The person I was having this conversation with said of the professional, “They’re worthless!”  I strongly disagreed, and stated why.

 As a Jesus-follower, I believe we are all made in the image of God, as scripture teaches.  That alone imbues each of us with a tremendous sense of worth.  While someone’s performance, in a certain area or in a particular instance, may be sub-par, that does NOT mean that the person themselves is worthless.

I’m trying to do a better job in my life of not just seeing people as worthwhile due to a set of attributes or character traits.  Rather, I’m working to see the value of people simply because they are fellow human beings.

Time Well Spent

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When my wife and I go away for a weekend, we usually like to get home around mid-afternoon on Sunday.  This gives us plenty of time to unpack, do chores, and ease into the upcoming workweek.  Last Sunday, we didn’t get home from our weekend away until 9:30 PM, and we’re glad we did.

As I mentioned in my previous post, we scheduled some time during our trip last weekend to see a friend on Sunday.  What was originally a couple hours together for lunch evolved into a whole day!  We all had a great day together that we will remember for many years.

If my wife and I were unwilling to deviate from our normal practice of getting home mid-afternoon, we would have missed an opportunity to spend a memorable day connecting with our friend.   We chose to spend our Sunday afternoon hours connecting, and it was time well spent.

Making Time

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My wife and I are going Ashland Oregon soon, to see some plays at the Oregon Shakespeare Festival.  We’ve been there before, and enjoy seeing the excellent plays the festival has.  This year, we’re making time for something different.

A friend of ours recently moved to the area, so we contacted them to see if they’d be interested in getting together while we’re there.  They’re interested, so we’ll be getting together with them.  We’re all looking forward to seeing each other.

For me, it’s easy to think, “We’re too busy” or “They’re probably too busy” and therefore not make time to spend with others.  However, my wife and I have both been working at making time for opportunities to connect with others.  Yes, it takes more work, but it has always proven to be worth it.  It reminds me that connection with others doesn’t just happen.  We need to make time for it.