character

A New Story

/ Scott / Leave a comment

As part of the work I do, I’m required to occasionally take proficiency exams related to the software we use.  Even though exams are multiple choice, they aren’t easy.  They require significant study and focus.  I usually do pretty good on multiple choice tests, but that wasn’t always the case.

Back in college, my multiple-test-taking-ability was not very good.  One of the main reasons why was because I use to tell myself, “I’m not any good at taking multiple choice tests.”  If I didn’t immediately know the answer to a question on a test, I’d usually just guess.  As you can imagine, this didn’t lead to great test scores.  It also reinforced the story I’ve been telling myself about how bad I was at test taking. 

When I first realized that exams would be a regular part of my tenure in my current position, I was worried.  Then I started thinking about why I was bad at test taking, and realized it wasn’t a sentence, but rather a story that could be changed.  So, I changed the story I was telling myself about my test taking abilities.  I started telling myself that, “I will easily pass tests on the first try because I will be prepared and will critically think about the answers I give, versus just guessing.”

Just like I became a poor test taker, because of the story I told myself in college, I have now become a good test taker who is prepared and easily passes because I decided to tell myself a different story about who I was.

Do you have story you’ve been telling yourself that hasn’t been serving you well?  If so, consider telling yourself a more encouraging story, and then start living into it. 

Benchmarking

/ Scott / Leave a comment

This week I’ve been reading one of my journals from 2015.  Reading old journals is like being in a time machine, because I can read what I was thinking in that particular moment and also know how things turned out 8 years later.  Journaling is a great way to establish benchmarks (where we currently are) and our goals/destinations (where we want to go).   

I was encouraged to see that for several of my personal growth destinations I was writing about, I was able to arrive at the destination envisioned at the time.  This was reassuring, as I was able to read my thought process and understand my desire, as well as actions to take, to get there.

My journals also revealed that I have areas that I wanted to improve on back in 2015, that I’m still working to improve at in 2023.  I was encouraged that there are areas of growth that were important to me then that are still important to me today.  And while my improvement has been slow, I still have the desire to improve moving forward.  My journaling from 2015 is still motivating me to continue to grow and improve, today and beyond.

Are there any areas in your life where you’d like to improve?  If so, I strongly suggest journaling about where you are, and where you want to go in life.  If journaling isn’t your thing, I’d suggest at least writing down the areas you want to improve, and what that improvement looks like.  This will provide a wonderful benchmark for your future self, so that they will know if they are on track or need to recalibrate.  It will also make for a nice conversation with yourself at a future date.

Lift Or Limit

/ Scott / Leave a comment

As I was journaling this morning, I was reminded how our self-talk can limit or lift how we see ourselves.  Think about that, the words you tell yourself, about yourself (whether audibly or simply thought), have a direct impact on how you feel and think about who you are.

Taking this thought a little further, what we think/feel, about ourselves, will influence our actions.  And, the actions we consistently take are what shapes the lives we ultimately build for ourselves.

The question that feels like it needs to be asked is, “Do you like what you’ve built?” 

If your answer is, “Yes”, great!  However, if your answer is, “No”, it might be reflecting on you’ve talking to yourself to discern if there’s any negative thoughts or talk you’ve regularly had with yourself.

It might even be time to start a new, positive conversation with yourself… because you’re worth it.

Plan For It

/ Scott / Leave a comment

Several years ago, my wife and I opened a savings account and titled it, “Travel”.  It’s where we regularly save money for the sole purpose of traveling.  Not only does having this account show that we prioritize traveling and getting away together, it gives is the freedom to go somewhere on short notice, or add a day or two to our existing plans.  It’s given us the freedom, as well as the encouragement, got travel.

If something is important to us, we need to plan and execute to make it happen.  Whether it’s setting aside time, money, or some other resource, our planning and execution shows our true level of commitment.  If we say we want to do/have/become/change something, yet we haven’t taken any steps to bring it about, that may tell us quite a bit about how committed we actually are.

Is there something you want to do/have/become/change?  If so, begin planning for it.  Then, follow up on those plans with specific action.  That “something” awaits.

Grateful For The Example

/ Scott / Leave a comment

I was listening to a podcast recently about the book, “Up From Slavery” by Booker T. Washington.  The positive attitude Mr. Washington possessed, both during and after facing terrible social injustices, blew me away.  I’ve since gone to the library and checked out this book so I can read it for myself.

Based on a few of excerpts from the book, that were read on the podcast, I was struck with how Washington chose positivity, focus, and growth, when he could have easily chosen bitterness, anger, and apathy.  Regardless of what happened to him that was outside of his control, he was focused on becoming a certain type of person.  Excuses were shattered by him, and circumstances were simply part of the landscape he had to navigate to get where he wanted to go.  Quite simply, the guy was remarkable.

Washington reminds me that if he can become a positive man of character, in spite of all the roadblocks and injustices he’s faced, then what excuse do I have not to do likewise?  I’m grateful for his example.      

Follow Through On Intentions

/ Scott / Leave a comment

I was really impressed with something our pastor did in church last Sunday.  As I was reflecting on it later in the day I thought, “I should send him a hand-written note and tell him how much I appreciated what he did.”  That’s a good intention.  However, as the week got busier, I could feel my intention slipping to the back burner toward inaction.  If I didn’t do something, the likelihood that this intention would ever bloom into realized action, was not looking good.

So last night I just decided (and actually followed through) that I was not going to do anything else until I got the note written and put it in an addressed envelope with a stamp.  As I type this, the note is in the care of the USPS and on its way to the recipient. 

When we have a good intention, we should honor that intention by taking the necessary action to bring it to life.  Not only will be feel good about following through on our good intention, we’ll hopefully be blessing someone else as well.

Starting The Day Grateful

/ Scott / Leave a comment

I made a focused effort this year to be more consistent with my journaling, and it seems to be working!  I’ve been writing 6 days per week since the beginning of 2023!  All I needed to do was weave journaling into a part of my daily morning routine.  Who knew it was that simple?

One thing I’ve been doing to start my journaling is to write 3 things that I’m grateful for.  I’ve heard a lot of people suggest that, so I thought I’d give it a try.  It’s amazing after a few weeks how many things you have to be grateful for.  We all know that, but it’s different when you actually see them written down.

I’ve enjoyed recalling things I’m grateful for when I journal in the morning. Not only is it a good reminder of how much I have to be grateful for, it also points me in the right direction mentally every morning.  When I start my day with thoughts of gratitude, it feels like I’m setting my mind up to be grateful all day, which is right where I want to be. 

Looking For Excuses

/ Scott / Leave a comment

It’s so easy to find an excuse to get out of doing something you don’t want to do.  Have you ever thought of looking for excuses to do what you know you should be doing?  

For example, maybe you go to the gym every morning when you wake up.  However, on this particular morning, it’s dark, cold, and rainy out when you wake up.  The easy excuse to get out of going to the gym is, “It’s cold and wet outside, but it’s nice and warm in bed.  I’m going to skip the gym today and go tomorrow.” 

At this point, you could also look for an excuse to go to the gym, regardless of the weather.  Your excuse to do what you know you should do, might be, “It’s kind of crappy out, but I’m already awake, and I’ll feel good once I’m done.  There really isn’t a good reason not to go.”

Looking for excuses to follow through, instead of mailing it in, is  a way to reframe the discussions we often have with ourselves when we’re trying to take the easy route.  Often times we just need to give ourselves a little pep talk, or light a fire for ourselves.  And often, a good excuse is just what we need. 

Division

/ Scott / Leave a comment

Think, for a moment, of all the things that people can have differing opinions about.  The list is endless!  Topics range from volatile ones like pollical leaning and religion to more innocuous ones like music preference, being a morning or evening person, or your favorite flavor of ice cream. 

Now think of the people you know.  How many of them do you have the exact same opinions on every topic with?  Zero?  Yeah, me too.

With so many things to be divided over, it’s important that we are mindful of what we actually allow to drive wedges in our relationships.  Do we really want to shut someone down or vilify them over minor differences?  Do we really want our radars up looking for reasons to be divided, versus looking for what unites us?  Do we want others looking us with an eye toward division?

Leading with an eye toward division comes with a high price.  We miss out on opportunities to learn more about others.  In some cases, we drive wedges between those closest to over insignificant differences.  What a sad realization it would be to look back on such a life, and see all the division we’ve created, because all we were seeing were differences versus people.

A Quick Thought On Foundations

/ Scott / Leave a comment

What foundation do you build your life on?  What grid do you run your behaviors, decisions and actions through?  For me, that foundation/grid is Scripture.  More specifically, the Bible. 

When I didn’t have a specific foundation or grid, what usually guided my decisions, behaviors, and actions was emotion.  Defaulting to emotions didn’t work too well for me, because my actions were based more on what felt best in the moment rather than a foundational values based decision. 

Even though I have Scripture as my foundation, I still need to choose to follow it and apply what it says in my life.  Although it can be challenging, I’ve found that Scripture provides me with a very solid foundation for making wise decisions.  A much more stable foundations than emotions alone.